#BlogLife221 - You're not a real writer *400th post!!*

Today marks the 400th post and I feel a bit weird about it. Even though it should be a celebration.

This week I'm really struggling to find any energy. I'm sleeping but I don't feel refreshed.

I feel as though something has taken over my mind. I don't feel down or upset.

I feel a bit empty and the cough that just disappeared, has now resurfaced with a vengeance.

The penpals are still driving me nuts. One guy wanted a bloody romance. It's not the Personals Ad. It's a frigging penpal platonic website!!

Another girl, got back to me from November of last year. WTF! You would think she would have the decency to apologise or make an excuse.

Nada! All she uttered was, do you want to carry on? Trash?! No! I relegated it to spam actually.

It's the same calibre of people that played online scrabble, brain dead zombies.

Every so often this restless mood takes over me. It was daunting putting my stories on Wattpad but there doesn't seem to be much traction aside from a few curious people.

Plus friends, randoms and acquaintances. I don't know if I should add the mini stories I've been creating on here, to make my profile look a bit fuller?

I know that I'm not at my best yet with the storytelling but I do feel like I have some sort of voice and vision, that's different to others.

I want to carry on moving forwards but I guess I feel a bit scared about those critical comments, that are bound to appear sooner or later.

I know my work can't be universally adored. I feel jittery it will be trashed over and over and eventually it will be put me off.

I also realise I can't stay safe as a creator and not take a risk. There are just many sites out there to choose from.

And as crazy as this sounds because I'm not the greatest with my content but I worry about, my words being stolen.

Most of them have copyright in place but what if someone keeps stealing my ideas and cloning my work?

Even with the blog, it's all original, coming from my experiences and thoughts.

It's disheartening to think of someone stealing my creations, that would make me lose my identity.

I guess the only thing that will give me comfort is that my work is dated, you can't argue with the time and date posted.

I will leave everything on Wattpad and maybe just experiment with a few new other sites.

Is this a step forwards or backwards? I can't even tell anymore.

I'll let you know which sites I pick and how the process goes and if there is any feedback, whether good or bad.

I think it's time for me to evolve and make some progress..