#BlogLife52 - I'm not a flirt! (Call spoof 2)

Hello sexy are you there?

Excuse me Sir, what did you just refer to me as?

Sexy. You should be flattered that is a compliment. I made your day right? C'mon admit it!

Ahem. Please kindly refrain from using that language when addressing me. I am not here to flirt or date. I am here to listen and offer guidance, if need be.

I know. I know. I know. Listen chicky. Don't get your t-shirt in a bunch. It is just the way I talk, alright? I know this isn't a dating/flirting app.

I am very relieved to hear that you are aware of the intended purpose. I would be content if you stuck to respectful dialogue that made me feel comfortable.

*Sighs* As you wish. I'm sorry that you were offended by my friendly tone. From now on I shall behave, happy?

Thank you. That is all I ask. How can I assist you today?

Thanks for asking dollface. By the way lambchop, where are you from? How old are you? Are you single?

Sir. I am going to insist on asserting some boundaries. As I have said before, my purpose is to be there for someone in need.

All you are doing is flirting. I apologise if you are really in need of counsel but heed my warning and act accordingly. Thank you.

Whoa whoa whoa. Where did the hostility come from? I just think we would make a cute couple and have adorable babies.

I am not doing anything untoward. You are overreacting. Just hear me out. I am 35 year old hot tottie. 

Toned, gorgeous. My own bachelor pad, soon to include you in it, if you loosen up my soon-to-be-wifey.

I will sadly be off then, if you don't want to be my honey bunny *sniffles*

Clearly we are at cross purposes here. Feel free to request someone else to talk to but I will end this chat now.

**Just to point out these are all crazy spoofs. None of these are actual conversations. I take confidentiality seriously.

I just need an outlet of revenge against the people who frustrate, annoy the hell out of me and make me bite my tongue :D