#BlogLife 43 - Call spoof

 Hello, can you hear me?

Yes I'm right here and ready to support you.

Hey, are you still there?

Can you not hear me? I responded and said I was available for you :)

Oh sorry. I heard something vague but my volume was low and I can't be bothered to raise it. Can't you just shout instead?

I'm sorry. I can't do that. This service is all about discretion and confidentiality. I need to maintain that.

Hmm. You seem quite uncooperative mademoiselle. 

I'm sorry you feel that way. I'm just trying to serve you the best way I know how.

Serve me? Serve me? SERVE ME? Listen chicky, we are not at a restaurant. You are not my waitress, got it?

I humbly apologise. Let me rephrase that immediately. What I mean't to say is that. I am ready to listen and be there for you.

That's better. You should have said that in the first place. What is this amateur hour?

Right. I'll start with the sweet and sour chicken and then I'-

Excuse the interruption but are you trying to make a food service order?

Don't interrupt. Now where was I? Oh yea, I'll have some of that boiled rice with egg and vegetables.

Egg fried rice?

Quit distracting me. I'm starving. Oh I'll have that drink that tastes citrusy. You know orangey. What is it called? 

Fanta?? 

No you are wrong. It's called Lilt. Honestly, for a server, you are completely inept.

*Takes a deep calming breath* First of all I am not a waitress/server. Secondly this is not a fast food restaurant. Thirdly this is a helpline for people who need a sympathetic ear.

Pfft. I know your game. Even though the number I dialled looks different than it normally does. 

I bet you are on a break and don't want to help. Helpline. Pfft. No help to me. 

This is the last time, you are getting my business and to think I was going to increase my tip from my usual 5p to 10p.

You can forget it!

*Call disconnects abruptly*