#BlogLife504 - Can I forgive you?

If you're caucasian I don't expect you to understand what it's like to be nervous in certain places or streets.

To look around and breathe a sign of a relief that there are other faces just like mine scattered around.

I'm still livid that in all but one of the public racist verbal and physical attacks that onlookers never said a damn word.

In the one particular instance on the main high street. English Shop staff heard our screams for help, came all the way out of their stores and witnessed us being sworn at, abused with hate speech and hit and stared like it was a sports show!!

Didn't bother to call the police or break it up or intercept. They stared like it was normal for two brown skinned kids to be targeted and attacked by two white kids.

Like we deserved it because we weren't white and lived in the UK. The same as the train, nobody made it stop.

I was only assisted one time by a kind passerby and he was white skinned, which surprised the hell out of me.

I guess my point is, that this former acquaintance using these slurs like it's cool is perpetuating that being white is above every other race because he doesn't see why it is wrong.

Those racial names are loaded with history and venom behind them. They are not harmless or meaningless.

They are ignorant and poisonous and cowardly and hurtful!

Everytime I think about talking to him or forgiving him. I remember the humiliation of being fought and called names and not being able to get away or protect ourselves.

When it was over, I looked at one of the staff and he was tutting like..... Typical kids, rough-housing...

When we we sobbing and fearing for our lives. He reminds me of that guy now.

The answer is No! I'm not sweeping this under the carpet to make him feel better.

There were numerous accounts that happened but I feel like I have blocked most of them out.

I wish I had thought to walk with a perfume vial to mace them with but live and learn, there is always one in my bag now!!