#BlogLife843 - You've been called out, accept it or don't!

Hmm I feel like I have to vaguely unpack this lil inner circle drama but it's not really to do with me, I just know the associates in question.

It doesn't feel quite appropriate to go into details but I've got a lot on my plate already. I don't want to focus on this too.

Somebody I know behaved badly and kept on either being oblivious or not caring.

Now people are coming forward and saying, that happened to me too and that is why they have retreated due to the offputting nature.

To put it into perspective, it's verbal inappropriate flirting/pestering with women that just tried to be friendly, helpful or did some basic chitchatting.

Now if this was me and I was told, I was being offensive or disrespectful and that I was making people around me uncomfortable.

I would be horrified. That's not me at all, I try to do the opposite, granted sometimes I am in no mood but still I would rather distance myself than provoke someone, unless they deserved it.

Anyway my instincts and conscience would tell me to apologise, clarify and either guiltily cut off the friendship or try to make amends.

Unfortunately this person lacks self awareness because he just said Oh but I was joking. Like that addresses or fixes anything??!!

No, no, no, no! Take responsibility for your actions. I called this a while back and said to someone close to me, I know you are going to reach your limit soon and block him.

Certain people cross boundaries and just don't learn from it. They see someone being sweet and attentive and instead of taking it at face value and thinking..

Oh I'm really lucky to have that person in my life, they get hooked on the focus and act inappropriately and flirt.

What makes it worse, so so so so much worse. These people are not single and he knows this.

If he had said I am wrong, even though to me I wasn't crossing any lines, the fact that you and others are upset, means that I behaved badly and I will take that onboard.

It would have gone down better but saying that I was joking around and that I don't understand why you're being like this, just cemented his fate.

Oof! He messaged me and I am ignoring it because it appears like he is going for the sympathy vote, once again.

As though he is blameless. Also the proof of this further hurts his case.

He said............... This is why I don't get close to people and I hate all these women targeting me. Hmm so your content to put it all on others?

Instead of taking a good hard look at yourself and contemplating, Wow let me work on myself.

Nothing will change, you won't find a partner or have healthy friendships if you don't see your faults.

You'll just keep being depressed, keep complaining and drive them away continuously.

I've suggested things and others have too but he doesn't want to help himself.

He's chasing someone that shows no romantic interest and that seems to be his pattern of destruction.

Why not go for someone you have a chance with? Oh because then you'd have to make an effort, have some growth, put in the hard work, go from being unhappy to happy.

And no more whinging, nope can't do that. Sorry to say but you brought this on yourself.

Maybe I should have stepped in and had a quiet word. I think I was worried I wouldn't be able to convey it properly.

I was concerned about hurting your feelings. You're a very sensitive person but at the same time, you need to be aware so that you can change for the better.

I know people are supposed to accept you as you are and we shouldn't have to change.

This whole subject makes me cringe. It's just that we all have to grow up.

We have to recognise harmful patterns of behaviour, that are doing us no favours.

Shouldn't our goals be to be happy? To be decent people? To respect others?

Eeek he just referred to this whole mishmash as she misunderstood me.

Plus he is trying to discredit her and others who he himself was inappropriate with ickkkkk.

I can't believe how nasty he is being. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

I feel protective when you yourself give someone the benefit of the doubt or others do but they take advantage and creep up even more, it's not right.

I have to say he did apologise to me but he obviously didn't mean it.

I have had my own dealings with him. He just doesn't really own up to his failings.

For my experiences. I found he tried to bully me into doing what he deemed the superior outcome.

I have my own thoughts and reasons for choosing the right path for me and he actually said if you don't do what I want, I won't be friends with you.

That started to put me off him a lot, later he claimed to be messing around and apologised but he seemed really aggressive that he couldn't dictate and that I wouldn't follow his advice.

Also the other thing was I didn't mention the blog, I'm very careful who I share it with.

As there is a lot of personal information here but he found out about it, either through my Twitter account, but I didn't share that either..

Most likely, I comment under videos and I highly suspect, he clicked on my profile where I added the blog and twitter addresses as I thought it would be good to attract people to it.

As a while back, he point blank stated, Oh I know you have a blog and I'm going to read it.

I felt so creeped out and uncomfortable by that. I didn't know what to say so I ignored it and he didn't give feedback or mention it again, which relieved me.

I would have preferred he asked me about it, instead of snooping.

He constantly tries to make amends but it means nothing if you don't vow to do better next time.

He just keeps pushing his luck and targeting women that think the best of others and try to make allowances.

But enough is enough, we are all fed up of being exploited. 

Sort yourself out!!

My blog link is out there for the world to see but I still have that hesitation when people ask to read it.

Especially men as they do not seem to grasp a women's perspective.

I've continuously experienced negative feedback and all I'm trying to do is express how I'm feeling in that moment.

So I attempt to explain that this blog is written by a woman, for women because I feel like, they are less likely to make snap judgements and tell me to be in a better mood or get over things.

I hope that anyone reading this will see that I face difficulties constantly.

It's not about smiling, being happy or ignoring my emotions. It's about trying to exist through the darkness and pain.

Trying to be open and honest and admitting, this is really hard to say but I'm not alright.

For years and years and years I pretended and I'm sick of doing that.

This is my chance to say, this is actually what is going on with me.

Most of the time I don't know that I cope all that well because at times something small can set me off.

There is no-one I can be 100% real with. I have to hide the fact that I'm stressed and worried and not in the mood to be bubbly and carefree.

This is why the blog was founded. I needed to let it all out. If you like reading it, thank you, if you hate it, that's ok too.

I'm not looking for every single person to like me, or like the content.

It would be nice if people could relate. It would be great to be understood and not feel I have to alter myself to be a good writer.

I try my best to mix things up but I'm not going to fake being chirpy.

I'm going to be myself and hope that I attract more readers and followers and people just wanting to hear about my crazy life.

I'm not perfect. I'm just trying to function as best as I can with everything that gets thrown at me.

Last thing, it still astounds me that the perception is I should be writing about one thing only ugh!

How would you not bore yourself to tears just focusing on one thing??

I like that the blog is varied. We have humour, sadness, pamper posts, we have fiction, stories, advice.

There is alsorts to keep you entertained. My brain finds it easy to switch, it actually prefers that.

Going from happy to sad or lighthearted to deep and meaningful.