#BlogLife1086 - Ever tried Baklava? (baklawa)

Pity, Iceland has sold out of the blue skies comfort, my favourite and have substituted it with the white one..

Hmm, I wonder if I will like it? Very confusing to have the cheaper bigger ml bottle, say it contains less washes than the more expensive but less ml bottle..

It does smell nice actually, thank heavens.

Cheaper one wins! I'm finally going to try the Baklava (baklawa) by Dina, £2.50 for a big box.. That's actually a small one

Hopefully will have the energy for a picture, I should take out the bins but I don't want too..

Ah the other things that are new are, Punjabi veggy samosas, £2.50 for 4 maybe? Hmm..

Ok, I love the pastry, it's seasoned with a hint of spice, the filling is ok.

Would I buy it again? I'm not sure. I think I like this pastry but with Iceland basic filling, those potato and veggies better..

So I have no idea, if I'll get it again, probably :)

And Southern fried chicken chunks £4 bag. I thought outside would be noisy but maybe they cancelled the community, get together, planning for an excursion thing?

I hear no noise but cars in and out.. That's good, probably isn't blocking access then.

I'm not sure why I don't have an appetite. I made myself finish the pasta, I enjoyed it but I wasn't really in the eating mood.

But it's late so I had too. I tried one baklawa piece, primarily because it's tiny.

And for once that's a good thing. It's so delicate, the pastry but infused with flavour.

Sweet, nutty, not messy, I was expecting syrup but it's definitely not dry.

I ended trying a filled one, seemed like jam, tasted a bit like that too, very nice.

I'm so glad it's not sickly, that was another concern but so far, I've loved everything I've tried.

Supposedly handmade, I have nothing to compare it too. I'm glad it's not filled with raisins or currants, well that piece wasn't.

Just plain but far from boring. I wonder how the other ones are?

It's a mini dessert really, it will definitely last a while. I can't face anymore food.

I'll just sip ice water. I put the pictures on twitter and took out the bins, I am sleepy.

It wasn't the regular Iceland guy but I just held the bags to be packed because I was just empty and sore and he didn't complain.

I wonder how you are supposed to store it.. Oh I have to wash off my makeup.

Just the usual foundation and pinky/purply hybrid eyeshadow.

Oh yea and finally spent that £10 I had in my purse for months..

My Oyster was near empty so I need it for travel, might as well use it up. That is an essential.

Ok phew, twitter is working again, it had just emptied my timeline and I wasn't sure if I was banned or the server was down or what...

I keep getting these pathetic warnings from them, that I'm supposedly spamming or my account isn't legitimate...

I will not be surprised if one day I log on and my account has been deleted permanently and because they are pushing to sign up for paid accounts....

I just feel this is the reason, to get rid of the free users, which is a shame.

I advertise the blog, the stories. I have a lil rant, here and there. I gossip about the shows..

I enter competitions but like I said, there will still be ways to follow this blog.

Via FollowIt, the email subscription, or bookmarking the page..

Or eventually maybe I will have had enough of twitter and switch to an alternative..

But I'll let you know :)

Oh and nothing from P, who is but a distant timewasting memory.

#BlogLife1085 - Call to zero....

What is the big deal about calls? The new random seems freaked out about them too.....

Yeesh does noone have balls anymore? I know it's a dealbreaker. 

Sorry effeminate voices do nothing for me but why agree and then back out..?

Why not just say, Could you give more time or I'm not ready, I'm worried how I'll be perceived....

But nothing. Yesterday P (good grief not a J, at long last, yay), said Oh I simply forgot, but proceeded to have a lengthy text session...

Hmm all that could have been done on a call, in which you could have said, You know what, it's a weekday, can it be brief..?

And I would have said, it's disappointing but I understand, rest is important..

Then he said, Tomorrow midday, I'll call or you can text/call to remind me....

Guess what, it's 1.30pm...... He abruptly left the text session last night, did he fall asleep.....?

Or was it because I said, I really don't have much of a heart to give really...

I didn't explain further and he didn't ask. I texted about 1pm and what makes it worse....

He said, contact me anytime because I'll be available and now it feels like a ghost....

And I trust my instincts ad knew something was off, men aren't clever...

So as of today Wednesday 12.45pm, still haven't a thing and the text was read and delivered.

The funny thing also and as soon as I heard I thought, that's just weird...

Was him saying, the first call will be Midday (yesterday) and the next will be Wednesday at 7am!!!

Who on earth calls someone at 7am? That they barely know??? I said There's no chance of that, I'll be busy.

But was this whole thing, a planned waste of time? Did he set out to bs me?

I don't get it, and I don't respect him for it. Yes I did like him, we talked about alsorts, not just light and fluffy.

I never pressured him for a call, just asked what he thought, I never forced him to accept.

I'm not going to chase, I made the effort and maybe later he'll have the guts to explain himself, but for right now I'm busy..

I wonder if it's bs syndrome.... Where they assume by saying the things women want to hear....

That they can snowball her, get her to believe it and when she/I don't....

When I'm still reserved and sceptical and holding back, like any sensible woman would take it slow...

They up and disappear? Because he said, He doesn't want or need anyone....

That he wishes I could believe that. But men do eventually need women.

I've never heard a man say, Yep, swearing off women, gonna be alone forever...

The way I proclaim it... He was saying, I haven't met the right guy... Pfft...

And that he's gonna take care of me, spoil me, blah blah..

At least I can say, I'm always upfront. I tell them, I'm not looking for anything..

I won't do meets or picswaps. I'm not gonna fall for them or unlikely to get attached....

And they are all accepting of these facts..... Until time passes and they assume.... What???

They can swoop in and save me from myself? Oh purleaseee.

Not one of them are ever patient, to give me time to work through it, or explain my hesitations....

I think either tomorrow or Friday I will block him, because I have a strong feeling, nothing dramatic has happened, he's not busy with work or family or friends....

He's just not interested and is a classic liar. Yes the way he got defensive about me not immediately believing him, was very telling...

Good guys don't shove it down your throat, they are decent, they let their actions and consistencies, speak for themselves.

Remember that lesson!!

Of course I'll update if there is any developments, but there won't be...

It's just nonsense..... You cannot, well you can, but it's much much harder to scheme on a call...

Insincerity tends to come out in someone's voice.... That's why calls are important and when someone resists...

What are they hiding? (I'm over my mopey session I had yesterday) ha.

For every person that doesn't want you, 10 more queue up to take their place.

I don't believe in soulmates but I do believe there are several people mean't for every individual..

It just takes some luck to hopefully cross paths, some are more fortunate than others :)

Being a spinster, isn't the end of the world, there are other ways to be fulfilled....

Like sharing your tales with others :)

Ugh I changed before I remembered I would do a same day Iceland order, luckily I just made the deadline and it's 2.30pm-4pm.

The community event outside is 1-3pm. I don't give a damn, I'm exhausted and sore.

The UC advisor kept me waiting for half an hour so my body was all stiff.

It made me inwardly roar with laughter that she was pissed to have to come down the stairs.

Why didn't you answer your phone? I'll confess here, the real reason.....

One you could have arranged a phone appointment prior to today that would have saved me a lot of physical pain...

But you are selfish, so you did not!

Secondly, I traipsed all the way down here, you're going to see me..

Thirdly I don't hear well or am received clearly outdoors on the phone, that's why I don't bother.

I told her, I didn't hear it. I didn't think it was pertinent to add, the phone is always kept on mute ha.

I feel no guilt and it's time to eat some pasta.

Today's ensemble as it was warm but windy. A black long top and over it a short sleeved purple tshirt.

Followed by brown trousers. The one thing about hair that is so fun as a woman, is flipping it.

I've missed that. It's so much fun. It's doubtful as it's no longer the morning..

But I hope G delivers my back is hurting. We'll see..

#BlogLife1084 - Chatty Chicks Watching Flicks 27 - Season 5 Sweet Magnolias

Hmm, well I guess this season seems more interesting than the last one.

I sent off about a thousand tweets about this current season, I think it's time for a Chatty Chicks..

I'm wondering if Erik's family vibe is perfectionism. It seems like he's trying to please them and not Helen.

He's not talking much and unburdening, but out to impress his niece who gatecrashed.

I wonder if she'll bring them closer or alienate Helen? Who already feels like the third wheel..

I guess they had to create conflict, where there isn't any. Sometimes I wish they would leave couples smooth for a bit..

I guess sometimes that isn't exciting enough.

Maddie and Cal seem mostly fine, except they seem on opposing sides career wise.

Cal wants 100% support and backing and Maddie isn't sure really.

Ronnie and Dana Sue worry me the most. He is consumed with his new business, his wife and daughter don't seem to matter and that's sad.

His new boss monopolises his time and he's thrilled and doesn't care about how that comes across to anyone else..

Even Jeremy said, I'd be careful to set boundaries, home life is important and that washed right over him...

I know they villify a character, when he/she leaves so is that what is happening?

Is the actor leaving?

To make it worse, now Dana Sue has a cantankerous former rival that enjoys baiting her and if she's not getting attention from hubby, she'll get it from him..

Not that she's flirting, but guaranteed he will be.

I'm so happy things didn't work out with Annie and Ty, he seems a user, when things don't go his way.....

Broken promises, just because she didn't run off with him and cancel her education, he continually doesn't visit..

I'm glad she dumped him and now has two guys chasing her.

One her Papa's employee, two a briefly visiting family friend's grandson I think...

I'm not surprised Helen postponed the wedding, with Erik withdrawing and people pleasing his family to such an extent that it's rigid and colourless.

Helen is vibrant sunshine, why would she want drabness???

Hmm I have a strong feeling the new property they want to acquire from Dana Sue's frenemy/new love interest/affair possibly...

Will go ahead, they will probably find a way to honour the legacy and make it a part of the building..

Hmmm so the gifts begin.. And Ronnie is being reckless, I wouldn't be surprised if he's the reason him and Dana Sue's house burnt down, which is gonna be another nail in the coffin for their marriage.

Oof not looking good, Ronnie's business has gone bust, Jeremy has pulled out and he wants to rebuild it.

If he had gone to Dana Sue with a plan and said. I'm going to get more investors.

I'm going to come up with ideas to make it profitable, give me six months..

Something like that, but he keep saying You have enough on your plate, I'll figure it out....

Instead of let's brainstorm, or talk it through together.... Breakup seems imminent!

Well I called it, Dana Sue wants a separation. Isaac is happy with his new beau.

Helen got married. Maddie and Cal are fine..

Ty is still mucking Annie around, meaningless texts, parcels, but no commitment. Pfft..

#BlogLife1083 - Nutty, fruity, yogy sandwich

Ahh I didn't think of it before but one of the Iceland substitutions was a sub roll instead of the round burger type and it actually works out better for the meatball sandwich.

Bit of herby Philadelphia, some burger sauce and all done. I wish I could add veggies but it's not in the budget this week.

I'm still enjoying the weather turning, this rainy mush is glorious. Me and blankie have been inseparable.

The baby meatballs are really tasty they have a nice seasoning to them, not salty, just good ingredients.

I did 4x because they are I guess the size of a mini doughball or a.. I can't think straight, but glad I got them.

Oof I'm actually full with that and it was small. I'll leave the chicken sandwich for later.

I sometimes think I'm famished and cook too much, then other times, I don't cook enough and go for more....

I can never predict my hunger...

Well another foodie mixture has cropped up. I wanted a third ingredient for the sweet toastie..

The Nutellaish spread was there, the frozen fruits that I forgot would turn soggy were there..

But something was missing? What else could be added? Then, I thought, would it be insane to add yoghurt??

Probably, so I got the strawberry one and poured in a few drabs, my my my, delicious sandwich.

I'm bloated and cramping so I can't tell if I am full or not. I'll just do some waffle fries to munch on and that's dinner.

I woke up to the strangest thing this morning. The phone didn't ring, I was drifting in out of sleep..

I saw a text and I thought ugh, spam or something and it said, Mrs H, can't make the appointment, will another day do??

Ha, what the hell.. How does someone misdial in this day and age?

I double and triple check the number prior to dialling... How do you call and text a wrong number, that would have been hilarious if I had answered...

Someone rambling and me laughing.. Umm, pardon a moi, I think you've got the wrong number...

What if it was a therapy session? I could have made a fortune on that call alone..

What if it was an embarrassing appointment? Oh well, I wonder how long it will take them to realise, they made a mistakey..?

Ok no more strange calls or texts. I think they wised up finally, ha.

Hmm an update for the butter body, it seems to need frequent shaking prior to use.

Normally it's like a lotion, when I shake it, it becomes a thicker butter.

What do I mean by this? When it's in thin lotion form, it absorbs quick and easy..

When it's in butter form, it takes longer to sink in, it sits there, but whatever form it's in...

My elbows are cracking worse and worse, really dry and the skin is breaking.

So it's been mixed results, but not great, I think 3x times I applied it yesterday and it didn't help..

I know the Radox bath soak helps, that's infused with essential oils..

But I'm stuck with these body butters now.

The fruits belong in yoghurt, that's the only place they taste good in really..

Looking through the messages on the volunteer site, I wonder why some people write as though they are telling a story...

To me it doesn't come off as authentic, it comes across like, I'm bored let's make something up for attention..

Suffice to say, I don't respond to those, I get enough time wasters.

#BlogLife1082 - UK vs US version of Mistresses..

I've just unpacked the shopping and G delivered it, so handy, no further backache, although I woke every few hours last night, so maybe that's why I feel drained and sore.

Everything was there but a few things were substituted and that's fine. 

The kitchen rolls were not available and that is irritating, you're telling me, all brands of that were out of stock??

I don't think so Iceland, either you were to lazy to provide a substitution or didn't want me to have a more expensive brand, tsk.

I thought I was nearly out, so that's why I was frustrated, I didn't want to do a top up shop and spend extra..

But turns out I didn't realise I have a brand new unopened pack, so that will last, maybe 1 to 2 weeks, I'm not really sure, I prefer to have extra, just in case.

I put the cupcake picture on twitter, they look nice, I thought one was chocolate, but that's ok.

They are soft and sweet, just the right amount of icing and a great bargain. I would get them again.

I actually don't feel hungry right now, it's only 11amish, so I'll try it later.

Wow the fruit bag looks tiny but it's still probably better value, than what is currently offered.

The meatballs look even tinier and they will shrink ha but again, there is a fair few included in the pack.

I have to do a mini laundry load and I've already taken the bins out so that's done.

Ok so tried the fruits, umm, hmm, definitely not as sweet as I hoped and nor is the nutella knock off but it does go together.

Maybe the key is to have it in small doses and surprisingly I have left over yoghurt, which is a bonus.

I always miscalculate but then again, it depends on my appetite, sometimes I'm famished and not satisfied and other times, I'm content with the portions..

Today is absolutely freezing which is nice, but in the late afternoony, it could still be boiling.

Ahh there is a UK version of Mistresses, that probably came out first, same sorta storyline.. Mixed details from the American version.

That's from 2008. I don't remember it and not sure if I watched it before.... Interesting though..

Out of both of them, The American seemed more drama-led I think, that had an edge and was more compelling.

I wonder if this one will turn out differently..

I'll do the Nutella-ish toastie later. I typically crave savoury things first.

I really do wish I could get a mud mask but not pay the earth for it.

I plucked my brows but the shape has already gone and I don't want to over pluck it.

I had cramps all morning but soon after I put on the binaural beats video they stopped.

I think my tum needs food soon but I'm not hungry yet. I'll do the uc stuff first and then as it's Thursday the Looney Tunes Mayhem event will start at 2pm.

But I want to get some volunteering done before that also.

#BlogLife1081 - I did an oopsie.... Eek/ Toasted fondue?

I shouldn't multitask but I can have about 7 tabs open and switch between them easily.

While I was munching and chatting, I meant to copy and paste the last sentence I wrote and for some reason it copied and pasted the blog link...

Oh my goodness, I cringed so hard. No no no, that was not supposed to happen.

So I quickly blocked him, closed the page, turned red and normally it hides the messages and says this person is offline now.

I hope that is what happened. I like to keep my private life, private!

That is the first time I've done that, I think. I've just done the shopping for tomorrow, I didn't feel like ice cream or ice poles because the weather is chilly, even though it's sunny.

The day started off raining, which was heaven to my ears. I've actually seen appealing stuff at Iceland but I am waiting for the sale.

Lemon loaf cakes are delicious, it's £3 for 4x I think but it doesn't say how small the mini is... Lil pricey for me.

I recall they stocked it years ago as a single, maybe a £1 or £2 and it was so good.

I'm glad it's back, but prices keep creeping higher ugh! On the plus side there was 6x cupcakes for a £1, now that's amazing value, I bought that to try.

And for a change beef meatballs, I'm going to make sandwiches/burgers with those.

Oh ok the frozen berry fruits mix is Iceland branded, I thought it was someone else.

2x 430g bags for a fiver. I guess that's ok. Insane the amount of different fruits included.

I wonder if it will be equal. Fruits are so versatile, it could be paired with waffles, yoghurt, pancakes, solo, smoothies..

Or in my case a (Nutini) Nutella knock off and croissants/toast...

I've never done this before so I'm excited. I'll grill the bread first and not sure how I'll defrost the fruit, maybe when I wash it in warm water possibly..

It just makes me think of a fondue, even though I've never experienced that..

Chocolate liquid and then various fillings, smothered in it, with the bonus of hazelnut also... :)

Hmm I don't think I want warm chocolate spread either, will add it after.

It's going to be messy and a lil extra work. Oh I just thought of another weird addition from watching Jamie Oliver..

He did a chocolate avocado thingy dessert. Hmm not sure about that blend either...

If I'm missing savoury, the bread and croissants will give that edge..

And if I get tired of the sweet sandwiches, I got a Philadelphia cheese garlic and herb for the beef/fish/chicken burgers, plus I might go mad and put some veggie spring rolls into it...

Mix it up, so the flavours are all different and wild, ha. Even though I don't cook really, I'm trying to be a lil more adventurous.

I'm already getting bored of bread, so hopefully this will give it a new dimension...

Oh and I even tried that burger sauce with a plain cheese toasty and it gave it a kick, not spicy, just more flavour.

A really good investment.

#BlogLife1080 - Reality vs Reality...?

I know reality shows are a bit of fun and escapism. I want to shut off my brain and tune in for the dramas and different types of behaviours and revelations..

And to learn about how couples relate to each other because I've never been a part of a couple and doubt I ever will be, so this is the only way to observe it.

It brings up questions for me..... Should you change for someone?

Or is it personal growth? How do you maintain a semblance of yourself while trying to please someone else?

Is that healthy? Will you end up with resentments or be thankful you've grown with confidence?

I've seen instances where someone is shy and reserved and they are paired with someone outgoing and talkative..

It doesn't really mesh well, the confident one, loves the sound of their own voice too much and the quiet person, observes and takes it in..

I'd take it personally if someone said I don't like your dress style, let me take you shopping to pick things out for you.....

Hmm, my style is my own, if you don't like it, don't wear it.

But if they said it differently.... I would like to treat you and further explore some more feminine outfits that I think you would feel and look great in, obviously the final decision is yours..

Then I would be more receptive to it. I'd still have my own input and to be honest, I do mainly wear trousers and pretty tops because I'm not the most comfortable in dresses or skirts.

To be honest, I haven't tried on a dress in years. I wonder now with this significant weight loss, would I look better?

I look in the mirror and I see this heavy set person, when I don't look in the mirror, I see a smaller version of myself.

With dating, I know you have to put the effort in and look nice for one another, but you also have to feel good in your chosen attire, otherwise you spend it awkwardly self conscious..

Hmm I kinda stick to the same toastie routine, cheese, egg or meats..

I'm thinking of changing it up and making it sweet toasties instead.....

Jam is too sweet, I thought there was a reduced fat one in Iceland but nope.

The problem is, so is hazelnut spread but what if I tapered it with something savoury?

I thought fruits but it's a lil pricey... Then lemon curd, is an interesting ingredient... Sweet, yet tangy...

I know most would pair it with bananas, but that's not my thing. Pears would be interesting but again, pricey and I need something to stretch it out for the week...

I've seen the frozen berry fruits are on sale 2x £5, which is better than paying £3 for 1 bag and it won't spoil..

Could be like a brekkie dessert type thingy...?!

I know it seems like sweet on sweet, but sometimes blueberries, raspberries and redcurrants have a slight bitterness to them.

Plus there is blackberries, strawberries and blackcurrants. It just sounds like a tall glass of Vimto, which was a blended berry drink, yum.

I'm not completely sold on the lemon curd.... I'll keep looking...

The other crazy thought I had was adding cereal to it or oats, sounds strange but intriguing or nuts...

All this has to fit into a budget.. I might just leave it to the fruit and chocolate...

I could do the same with croissants, make them loaded with chocolate and fruit....

#BlogLife1079 - Hello again blankie

So because the weather has changed, I can use blankie again. Even though the pain is gone mostly..

It really helps to soothe my body but the only downside to it, it makes me so sleepy so by 8pmish, I found it so hard to keep my eyes open.

I'm not sure if I'll use it today, because I have to put the boiler on for about an hour, to keep it working..

It's 11amish but not hungry yet. I can't stop yawning. I think I had a succession of dreams that I don't remember but it felt like I was awake..

It's a very weird feeling and it just doesn't make me feel properly rested.

Dreamless nights are so much better for me. The brain needs to switch off.

Typical Just Eat sent me a £10 voucher, then an £8 one but I can't use them. Sensibleness now.

Ha! Why are the randoms so weird? RL returned after a 3x day ghost. Perhaps too soon to block, but seems a lifetime..

They all say the same, yea I was chatting to you normally, but you weren't, my replies were ignored or unread..

I can't recall which.. Anyway so we resumed, not on messenger because I give a chance, but if you ignore me, then, I'm going to uninstall it..

But then he decided to talk at me and flood me with information, I was so put off by that....

Literally read like a personal advert, name, age, hobbies. I kid you not!!

Why would you do that??? So I said this is not chatting organically..

I felt like I was on a damn dating app, not a chatroom..... Yeesh!

He said I was trying to familiarise you but nevermind take care lol.

Do men not think about what impression they give to others? It's just too much.

Another random, every sentence was innuendo...... My heavens.....

Seriously, why?? After a few minutes of realising, he had no substance, I just said, It's pretty pathetic that's all you can talk about and blocked him.

Then lastly L said I'm not giving up, which made me laugh... I could have sent a mean reply about him being gutless but I don't want to encourage chatting, so I just left it.

I'm mostly finding if I want an earthy chat, mainly women on the volunteering site are posting about important topics.....

What get's you through hard days?

How do you cope with burnout?

Compared to male questions.... What do you look like? What's your best feature? Where do you live?

Pfffft, ignore, ignore, ignore!

Well I did it. I found out how to update my profile on Cups and amended it to I'm not taking on any chats.

I like the Listener status of being able to message friends privately, but listening to members repeatedly behave disgustingly towards me is not acceptable at all.

I will not tolerate it anymore.

I've tried the Birds Eye waffle fries, it was on sale for £2, 80p discount maybe.

Really small bag but I have a small handful and it's fine, quite tasty, tiny chunks.

Good seasoning. I would get that again but not for the full price.

So far everything goes with that burger sauce, really versatile.

Next I saw Cajun chicken burgers so I'll try that, if it's too spicy, the burger sauce will taper that.

I'm sure that was on sale too but I can't see the discount.

The Cajun chicken burgers are just ridiculously over spiced. I don't taste seasonings just pepper.

I won't buy those again, my face is still tingling, red, but it didn't linger too long.

I probably now, would dump more sauce on it. It's not really enjoyable to eat but I won't discard it. I will finish the rest of the box.

Now is the time, I wish I had cornettos or lollies.. Whether I like the new products or not, it's something out of the ordinary.

I'm actually glad I got a mixture of the healthy and non healthy yoghurt because I'm really craving sugar and chocolate, during this pmt moment.

I'm actually surprised I haven't started my monthly yet. I seem to always need that sugary fix.

I seem to wake up exactly around 10am every day, I kinda wish on the weekends, it would be a bit later but at least I'm getting chunks of sleep.

I think what happens to me, with the insomnia, is that I wake up a lot, but sometimes, it might only be for a few seconds, so I don't notice but it's still broken sleep which means my body is not resting and healing 100%.

#BlogLife1078 - Refreshing rainy joy

Song of the day - When I'm Good and Ready - Sybil

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYx7zV-IcB4&list=FLI0DEk_aDykRP0sJnme-JBg&index=3

I was looking forward to the pasta but now I've lost my appetite. I forgot to mention the UC appointment was smooth, didn't wait that long and it wasn't the usual person.

So no headaches really, I counted my change and had enough for pakoras or pizza and wings but I can't help thinking, save it for emergencies.

Such a strange day, really humid indoors so I didn't walk with a jacket, but it was drizzling lightish with heavy intermissions.

It wasn't cold at all, and pretty funny to see some in jackets, some in shorts, some cowering under shop umbrellas from the light rain.

I decided to wear this top I've never worn, black and white, lace sleeves and flowers I think..

Of course now it's baggy on me but it's nice. I wore a tshirt and a long thin top underneath and I was fine.

The rain was refreshing, I tilted my head upwards because I spent the morning thinking, I want to vomit.

I wonder if I'll get any grocery substitutions? The laptop was going berserk today, it wouldn't stay on the page.

I'm not tired but my body would love to lay down and do nothing.

If I put the blankie on, I think I would suffocate unfortunately. I think the binaurals numbed me or lessened the pain.

I ended up dancing as I was putting away the groceries, it all came and as I peeled off the burger sauce lid and tasted it.....

Boom it took me back to my childhood vacationing in Iceland.

That so-called mustard sauce I was introduced too, but reassured I would love, was indeed a burger sauce, so mystery solved.

Mustard is strong and bitter.

The sauce I bought.. It's too sweet, sharp but not in too bad a way, less sugar would help, but it is nice.

The other brand is less sugary, Hellman's maybe? I am so sleepy and my eyes have this glue thing happening.

Foggy and blurry, the eye drops are not helping. They are just dry.

Well I had a late night but I was shattered and I think I fell asleep quicker than normal.

I got up at 10am which is perfect, my body feels less strained. I think the pain has all gone, thankfully.

Rest and the binaurals worked, I played them all day and although, it didn't seem it did much...

It probably worked like an invisible massage. I'm so relieved I did the grocery shopping yesterday, so I could sleep in today.

We didn't have rain for ages and now it's sprinkling off and on, glorious :)

#BlogLife1077 - Officially voluntarily sick

Song of the day - Azizam - Ed Sheeran

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLOndf14-v0&list=WL&index=81

I went against my better judgement and thought I was helping to support a fellow Listener.

I know what it's like to be confused or overwhelmed. It seemed straightforward and normal..

And then, they thought it was appropriate to share a snippet of a graphic conversation Yuckkk!

What is wrong with you? One it's supposed to be confidential, you don't repeat private chats..

Two, What do you want from me? To say, yea go ahead, enjoy it.

Cripes you're supposed to be a Listener, not a pervert! Neutral, you listen and support!

Ick. I am so grossed out!

Yuck, yuck, yuck. Ok time to calm down and wash my eyes and brain out and forget that icky chat.

They apologised and I know why they have a low rating, probably using being a Listener to flirt or have inappropriate adult conversations...

Anyway whatever I will not be partaking of any messages anytime soon.

I just paid my rent and heaven help them if they mentioned false arrears again......

The charge was £641.11 and that seems to align with what they've told me and UC. Well sorta...

I had 2x possible amounts listed. Oh and now I know what the repayment fee is, each month £50, a bit ouchy but could have been way worse..

Funny they know my expenses but haven't cancelled the £34 deduction from having a lot of savings, which is depleted now..

At least I'm doing ok, there is enough for bills and groceries. I'm almost out of food.

I'm hormonally really hungry, so eating more. I'm still going to wait and order groceries for Thursday.

Tomorrow is the UC appointment (Wednesday). I'm going to make a chicken sandwich toastie but I never put everything under the grill at the same time.

The rolls are quick to toast, the chicken takes about 10 minutes.

Ha, I've got no mayo or butter and a very bloated tum.

Just got back home and I just have this feeling because I was bending a bit, my shoulders, back, feet are really tender.

I thought sod it, Iceland had same day delivery with no charge and I have a feeling after the pasta, later I'll be hungry so there's nothing indoors, might as well have it come today.

It's still early and bright but I hope G delivers it in bags, my back is screaming in agony and more bending is just going to cripple me.

Plus carrying to the kitchen and unpacking, really not ideal, I just want a takeout..

But I don't wanna starve so it's just necessary. Oh strange thing happened.

I found the bread knife, it was stuck under the cutlery drawer thingy...

Then I lost the protein tablets for the lens, I found them again so I can do it tonight.

I decided to try Absolutely Saucesome burger sauce. It's £2.25 for a 1 litre bottle, so seems value for money, the reviews are good.

I'm trying not to move because every time I do, painful twinge occurs.

I brought back song of the day, I don't know what I was watching and this song came up. I googlied it.

At first I wasn't sure I liked it and then, after a few times, I thought Yea I do.

#BlogLife1076 - Chatty Chicks Watching Flicks 27 - Fairly Legal

This is actually a cute lil show, only two seasons sadly, about a lawyer/mediator, dealing with a messy, still in love but upcoming separation/divorce..

Being a workaholic, having a step Mama/boss, a flirty colleague, which I'm not a fan of him, I prefer her ex.

A cool bestie assistant that's a straight shooter but he's loyal, who seems her only friend aside from her brother.

And the death of her Papa. She wants to see the good in people.

I didn't really understand their relationship, the closer the divorce, the closer they became.

They both seemed to need each other, professionally and personally but she sorta pushed him away and then he confessed he cheated and before that, said I kinda wish I'd never met you, I mean ouchy.

I know, we all know, whoever they start off, they rarely end up together, so a break was imminent.

I'm still holding out for a reconciliation. They suit each other, balance each other out.

I wonder if it will be a cliffhanger ending like Benson?

Something that was on my mind, was the potential of her ex hubby's office being bugged and the thought never occurred?

By his rival boss? They had a private conversation at work and suddenly his boss knows? Aren't you curious, how he found out?

Nope and then you continue to have more sketchy chats in your office, weird to me.

I'm not really keen on her using people, even if it's to benefit someone deserving.

You don't really see her appreciative thank yous. Send someone a bottle or take them out to dinner, don't continue to play them, just because they have a soft spot for you.

That's called selfish manipulation.

Ugh I'm not going to get my wish, so they are back sleeping together but are not trying to reconcile, which is sad..

She gonna choose the idiot colleague instead.. Ugh..

I'm not happy with the pre ending, the ex did fight for her and she's pretending she's happy with him

But why isn't she? I can only think it's because he cheated and somehow doesn't trust him to really be there and stay..

The colleague said, I know why you went back to him, instead of a date with me, it's because he's safe and we are uncertain and you can't control it...

I just think the colleague isn't right and that's why she'll eventually pick him for real because it has an expiry date.

Her ex that is real, that you have to work on and compromise and mature...

She seems content to be a child sadly. Ugh not liking her behaviour.

Her ex surprises her, even though he has an early start, instead of her saying, right I hear you, appreciate this fantastic night..... Let's leave so you're refreshed tomorrow..

She's like yea, keep drinking, let's keep partying. Does she only care about herself and men fawning over her shallowness?

Seems so...  I knew I'd hate the ending, she broke up with her ex and the fact she kept repeating....

I know you think I'm scared and just running away.... I thought you so are chickening out!!

It's pathetic. She didn't get on with her step Mama, but ending up staying with her, rent free, probably no chores, no grocery shopping and at first they were not close..

But why didn't she stay with her brother? Probably because he left or was written out....

But a grown woman, you can't go apartment hunting? Get a car?

You're just relying on your assistant to chauffeur you like a brat? Irritated me.

For the most part, I did enjoy it, but her pattern of selfish behaviour, got grating.

Treat others with respect, the world doesn't revolve around your needs and figure out what you want, instead of continually hurting others because it's not right.

And I know blah blah, it's just a show but still.... Ha, what will the next binge be???

#BlogLife1075 - A touch of lemon?

I think just before 5pm, the Garnier lemon face wash trio arrived, secured in bubble wrap.

Hmm, I sniffed it in the bottle and it doesn't really have a scent. There wasn't much on offer unfortunately.

Amazon has a nasty habit of hiding items, when you search from low to high, so you typically have to keep it at featured products, aka premium priced..

Anyway I could have gotten something I've used before or this trio for just over £4 I think it was.

But I like trying new things so I will chance it and let you know how it performs.

Then tomorrow/today the fan and the body butters will get here, hopefully in the morning, it's so draining wearing layers but I like to cover up.

Although I thought sod it and answered the door in a long long top.

Normally they drop it off anyhow and he was there, all friendly lol.

Good job I epilated my legs for the first or second time this year, there's not much hair remaining, nearly all permanently gone.

I think I'm bloated, hungry but not hungry so I just cooked some veggy spring rolls to snack on.

I'm mainly drinking ice water. The only bad thing about having a full freezer, the icebox on top is too packed to put my water bottles in overnight.

Even the ice poles haven't solidified yet and it's been 8 hours. I'm going to get more water and refill the water bottles so I don't run out of cold drinks.

Ugh when will this heatwave end? Oh someone said if you hang out wet items in the room, it's supposed to help cool the air?

I got to test that theory, I've forgotten if it's works. I do have laundry to do!

A thought occurred to me but I don't think I could be a damsel in distress, I could have asked G or one of the couriers to open a jar, but what if they refused?

Cringey.....

Strange so the body butters are coming with Evri couriers and the fan is coming by Amazon, very odd, it's normally bundled together.

At least I can relax, after they get here, please be in the morning, so convenient..

Oof what a mess the Amazon deliveries were. I literally couldn't wait anymore, to get a drink, munchies, a few minutes in the kitchen....

Then I return and see Oh we missed you, problem, we'll try again.....

You had all that time but seriously I never heard anything that sounded like the buzzer.

I'm not even sure he rang it, or just a short time. Well if you want to carry around my body butters, so be it.

Very annoying, last time the redelivery took days.. Pfft.

The Minthouz fan was stalled, it said You're next and then seemed like 30 minutes of nothingness.....

I thought Hmm, you're butt is going backwards, You're lost, here it comes, failed delivery again...

So I just rolled my eyes and waited and then boom, You're next again, about half an hour later..

It was delivered yay. I don't know if the steady red light means, it's charging, or it's fully charged?

I left it for about an hour I think and Yes, finally a fast charger one!!

It seems pretty powerful and sturdy on the lowest setting so that's good.

It's nearly 7.40pm so I'll try and count how long it lasts, while the other charges up.. 16 hours it was.

Wow and it was a mixture of the lowest setting and the second one. Maybe 3 or 4 altogether, quite impressed.

Ah interesting, it wasn't even fully charged and lasted that long, just stuck it on the charger and the red light is just on..

Maybe when it's ready, the light will come off? After 5 hours, the red light is still on, I gave up, I got other stuff to charge and only 1 fast charger.

I don't know if I should risk the older one, it always falls and breaks...

But night time is so horribly stuffy and I can't sleep... It's a dilemma for sure...

I had a lil panic, I threw the new fan on the bed and the top came off, Are you kidding me???

Broken already?? Ugh..... But turns out the face is removable and I had to twist it back into the lock position..

I didn't know that I was a feature, but yay, not broken.

Well Saturday afternoony is here and I am starving, this time, no kitchen, no water, no food..

I just waited 11.30am - 1.30pm for the Evri courier and just before 1pm he showed.

The sandwiches are cooking, I grabbed snacks and here is my initial verdict on the body butters....

It's not a body butter, it's thinner, not thick, I actually do like the smell, it's like a pudding or like a chocolate/vanilla custard cakey?

It's familiar but I can't place it. The reason for body butters, the legitimate ones..

Is because my elbows crack quite badly and a thick luxurious butter temporarily soothes it.

I'll still see how it performs, maybe it won't matter being thin and light???

Come on food, hurry up and cook....

After checking my elbows the next day, it's not completely healed but it's half moisturised...

So although it's not thick, it's better than a lotion. I kinda feel, it's just something that needs to be applied to my skin, a few times a day, to keep on top of dryness.

But at least I don't regret getting it, it's just a slower process to soothe irritated dehydrated skin.

And a hell of a lot nicer than the yucky wax scent, American Dream had, ick..

I'm hoping they last well into next year. Would I get it again? Umm...

Maybe only if it was on a special offer again, full price? Hmm there is probably better quality out there.