#Bloglife206 - New J's sex chat

Afternoony lovelies, How is the weekend treating you? It's bitterly cold and I'm wrapped around a heated blankie or I was but I keep running (aka briskly walking) to check on the food.

Chicken pasta for the curious amongst you. I had a new chat which morphed into a phone conversation with a new random J.

Very pleasant voice, not deep deep but manly. It was quite entertaining on a variety of topics.

Then the flirting began and the insistence about narrowing down my location. Ick.

At that point I had to set the record straight I wasn't interested in hooking up for any reason. 

He seemed to understand but on further probing having a spicy chat was mandatory and knowing my almost exact location was also a deal breaker :D

If I asked a random a question and he wasn't comfortable answering it. I wouldn't keep hounding him about it. I would move on.

I was doing everything I could to put him off from any romantic notion and it was mostly working until the flirty personal questions began.

I answered some and the rest avoided like the plague. I wanted to see if he would respect my wishes to be vague and at ease.

Sometimes I say to them, this isn't an 0906 number, if you want that, call them, not me.

It's just irritating, you can have an amusing chat but if you refuse to discuss sex, you're blacklisted and kicked off further interactions.

Maybe he assumes, hmmm, if I can entice her towards a mature area, she'll be looser and agree to picswaps and a romp rendezvous.

The opposite is true in my case. If you can have a giggle with me, possible light flirting and don't push me to know everything then I'll keep you around because you're more flexible.

If not you're a tedious, short, temporary fly by night and I have no further use for you because someone with brains that isn't ruled by hormones is genuinely appetising to me.

#BlogLife105 - The flirty ride home

It's weird how I can open up to some people straight away and others I remain closed off from either permanently or just to begin with.

When I got into the cab from mama's I usually just take the cues from them, some are chatty and other's prefer not to talk. I don't mind either but at least when someone is engaged, I feel less panicky.

My PTSD triggers can occur anytime but usually it is when I am dreaming or outdoors. That is why I use talking or listening to music as a coping mechanism.

At first he started off quietly so I didn't think anything of it and was just playing games on my phone and then he just became more chatty.

Actually flirty and friendly. I was telling him that was my mama seeing me off and helping with the bags and that we were just celebrating and he was surprised that she looked so youthful for her age.

I just told him that it is good genes. This family just ages well, without wrinkles and visible signs, except on our scalps. As expected the follow up question is always heritage based.

Where is she from? I sometimes give a complete answer and other times, give the vague version. I just get annoyed when someone has assumed my identity just by looking at me.

If you are just assuming facts about me. I can't be bothered to correct you. You just seem ignorant to me but if you ask me, then I might be more inclined to share.

I told him and he was surprised as they usually are and said Oh I want to marry someone from there and what is your ideal type of guy?

I was just laughing thinking, strange how I am sitting back here, thinking he preferred not communicating with my optional face mask still plastered on my face so it's half hidden with no makeup on.

Then suddenly he's being kinda charming? I guess. I didn't mind because the distraction is useful and the drive is a bit of a trek.

Plus I was feeling off balance. I just felt like by my mama praising all those people that I didn't like and who treated me shamefully..

She was reinforcing their disgusting behaviour. Basically saying all that happened to me was acceptable because she looked up to them and admired them so they couldn't be imperfect.

I felt quite low actually and a bit teary. I maintained my composure but admitting out loud that I couldn't wait to go home and be at peace was sad.

Shouldn't my visit have been uplifting and care-free? I am just reminded that my relationship with my parents has and always will be shaky.

#BlogLife78 - The wrong approach

I was tempted to call this *I'm a ball buster* but considering the recent post joking about DomLife I thought hmmm. Nope lol.

Recently I got this guy who was full of confidence but confusing. 

It was like he had an invisible script writer prompting him. 

Like he had never spoken to a normal female before. As though he escaped from a desert island and was free at last.

He mumbles a nonsensical weird dialogue introduction. I'm baffled but polite and just say hello. 

Then he repeats and apologises for wasting my time. I'm shrugging and saying take care.

Then he says No I won't because I wanna talk, so I'm thinking I need to kill time, why not. 

Then his whole attitude/demeanour alters. Like he reeled in a fish and I'm supposedly a sure thing. 

He starts puffing out his chest and telling me how's he's a ladies man and women are predictable and how he's not to be trusted.

And in my head I'm already rolling with laughter. But I play along, until he slips up. Again and again and again.

I mean the stockings thing really? Rolls eyes. Plus some other things which had me dying. The whole Vicki Michelle look, so I rolled my eyes and said French maid? 

And he said No! However that actually was her look in the show. The man didn't even know what the hell he was saying.

Then he talked about how if he just met a woman he would insist upon visiting her home and I thought what brain-dead female would let a strange weirdo into their home???

I don't even give out my number, let alone my address. Purleaseeee! Who are these illogical women?

I have to believe he is fabricating because that is the only thing that makes sense. He has no authority, no credibility, no assurance about him.

No woman would do anything he suggested. Everything took ages to say and I started questioning things and wow he snapped!!!

You broke my concentration. I don't know where I am. The man was pouting!!

My sides were split at that point, it was hard holding it in.

Then he said you really know how to anger a man don't you? (He actually swore but I cleaned up the language for you).

I replied Kinda and left lolol. I chuckled so hard it hurt. 

Why when you are talking casually, making yourself out to be God's gift to women, do you need to concentrate so hard on your words?? 

How is it, you can't take a joke? The most off-putting thing is a humourless man. Ugh.. 

I'm constantly being weird and having a laugh. I can admit cringey things. It's fine. 

The world didn't end I survived I got over it. Big deal, but the fact he couldn't do that and said your loss... 

That really gave me a fit of laughter. Boohoo whoa is me. I'm really depressed now lol. 

Has he never met a strong woman before? Lol. Alright I'll stop because I can't chortle anymore. It hurts. 

If you insist on speaking to me and trying to chat me up. At least be yourself while you do it. Don't pretend to be something you're not.

I will unravel you and call you out on it. I have bouts of insecurity but there are times when my conviction in myself is sky high.

I can actually live that attitude because I'm not faking it. There are experiences I have gone through which make me tough and strong and I can say yea I'm a beastess because I know stuff inside out.

Be who you are and accept it. You will get a much warmer reaction!

It pays to flirt

I had a bit of a rocky start this morning when I discovered to my horror that my oyster card had jumped ship from the safety of my cocoon handbag to somewhere else.

 I was rushing out to get the bus and thought I had just left it carelessly on the bed as I had tipped out my bag earlier to make sure all the essentials were packed.

I did an about turn when I found out it wasn't in the front pocket of my bag and quickly did a mini search as I had already missed my bus and the next one wasn't due for a good ten minutes but it was frustratingly nowhere to be found.

There was nothing I could do and I hoped the driver would take pity on my few bits of cash that I had in my purse.

Last time I had to pay £3 and I had just under that amount or a £20 note which I didn't think he would accept either.

Then I discovered that cash was no longer accepted and i just had to swipe a card against the machine which cost only £1.50. 

I'm not sure how they went backwards on that but at least I got my bus and wasn't embarrassingly kicked off.

The journey home was much easier as the machine on the bus wasn't even working so saved another few quid. 

Then I got home and really checked everywhere I could think of, my kitchen, my bathroom, my other bags, even my bed but alas either someone stole my card or it fell out of a zipped pocket.

I called up London Transport with low hopes that they would help me and the first woman I spoke to, did in fact think I was a child and wanted to charge me £10 for a new card.

Then I explained I was in fact an adult and she transferred me to a man who had a very deep sexy voice.

I played the frazzled overwhelmed victim to a tee and no fee was ever mentioned. 

In fact he went out of his way to explain the process while laughing hysterically about my naivety in not knowing that buses no longer accepted cash payments. 

Afterwards he remarked that I was the nicest person he had ever spoken to in his whole career working at London Underground. I then thanked him, wished him well and disconnected.

My shiny oyster card should be received within a week and the money will be transferred, which is a relief as there was just over £20 registered on it. 

The really strange thing is I had just given away my spare oyster card to my mum who said she wanted it for guests and then she found an old oyster card today so she will be returning my spare.

The day could have been much worse but I'm grateful that it wasn't.

*A little update (18/8/16)*  I've already received the replacement oyster card that was sent first class delivery. 

I assumed it would be standard as he said within a week It should arrive and not only did he include a complimentary wallet for my card.

He also paid the £5 new card deposit fee for me, so basically the man saved me £15 plus the cost of a protective case. 

It may not seem like much but to me it's these random acts of kindness by strangers that make the world go round.