#BlogLife670 - I'm an only child from now on..

They don't exist anymore. I want to start afresh. Let's all pretend I live in fantasy land and growing up was normal and respectful.

My parents accepted me for being a plump, shy, kookie, introverted, insecure and unsociable daughter..

And I revered them for treating me right and not being a colossal disappointment.

They were actually proud of me and didn't expect me to be someone else, plus uttered those kind words frequently.

I was able to form special long lasting friendships and romantic relationships because I was never verbally abused or assaulted and had the ability to communicate effortlessly plus trust people and men.

Even ill or healthy, grouchy or friendly, I would never feel alone or as though there was no room for me, as I somehow warmed people to me.

I was going to call this post Burn in hell where you belong..

But I'm trying really hard to be a lil zen. I'm at the next stage in the depression, watching tearjerker movies.

I'm dehydrated from all the blubbering. I feel like my immune system is weak. I've got the sniffles and a headache.

I was on a Kajol binge, Dilwale, Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham and Kuch Kuch Hota Hai.

All guaranteed to have me weeping and laughing.

Anyway back to fabrication. The pain was somehow bearable and I was able to exercise without any injuries occurring.

Clothing wise, I was an imperfect size 18, not skinny but not really too overweight either.

I had a moderate tum tum which stuck out a bit and made me seem bloated.

Dating was something I got excited about and had no baggage or hangups anymore.

Writing and blogging had evolved into something more professional as I became candid about pretty much everything. My health, my past and what I hoped to achieve in the future.

I self published and made a success from all the fictional stories. I was no longer anonymous. SS had departed and the real me emerged, complete with a photograph.

I was able to open up and connect in a different way than previously because I had never been depressed, just a lil awkward.

Side note, imagine having kids or a significant other and saying You're never going to meet my family because they are hazardous!

Alright back to reality, I'm not really sure what the point of this post is, although the more I write, the better I seem to feel.

Exploring my insides seems to benefit me, even if no-one is reading or understanding quite how bad things really are.