Showing posts with label miscommunication. Show all posts
Showing posts with label miscommunication. Show all posts

Thursday, 23 February 2023

#BlogLife458 - I will never understand men...

I'm still in a brain fog, topics float in my head and then disappear, it's hard to write when nothing sticks.

Hence the delay, sorry about that but after a long rest and food, I think I can finally make sense of it.

My friend was just telling me he's having computer issues and another mutual friend is really good with those types of problems so I suggested he give him a shout and explain what's happening but he refused.

I'm not sure why he's making such a big deal of getting help, I'm no fan of it but if someone is friendly and approachable and willing to dive in and give his take, then why not seek it out?

He confessed he's been googling and checking youtube and forums for five days now.

I don't get it at all. I just pmmed our friend G and asked him to talk to the guy and offer some perspective.

I know how much computer issues stress me out because I know virtually nothing except anti virus and even that perplexes me.

Ha maybe it's a pride thing. I know we would all love to be able to solve our own problems but it's not always possible, at the very least having a sounding board can give you further insight.

G just got back to me and consented so that is that.

I spoke to P last night again, we don't even make plans to get together, I just log in and see if he's about and I guess he does the same.

Normally I think he eats dinner and then comes online but yesterday was different.

I wasn't bothered I just said take your time, I'll see you in an hour maybe and I was just re-watching Mike and Molly episodes.

Hmmm looking back on the show, for someone that thought she was sooooooo superior to everyone else, she sure was selfish and self righteous a lot.

Did her own thing and to hell with the consequences, a hard person to like.

But then some of that is like me, although I try to support other people when they clearly need it too.

Anyway P comes back in just over an hours time and gives me a strangers greeting.

I was gonna mess with him too. Then I just got all confused, why would he be saying good evening, instead of I'm back..

I put we need to talk, just to have a laugh and scare him a bit and he reacted strangely.

I followed up with, are you not him? He replied, I don't know who you're talking about.

I'm not him. I double checked his name and the thing with online is that there are dopplegangers everywhere.

People mistake for someone else frequently. I thought, either it is a different person.

Or he's playing a weird game or he just doesn't wanna talk and this is a strange way to end things.

I thought hmmmm. Let's try this tactic because I half laughed it off.

I just put that my apologies, I thought you were someone else and I have to go now because he doesn't like me talking to other men, ta ta lol.

I just left it, even though he put, I admire your loyalty. There was silence for 10 minutes and I thought if it carries on much more, I'm off.

(Eeek side note, I think G is peeved at me, he's not saying much.

I think he's a lil miffed that the only reason I pmmed him was to ask a favour and not chat to him, oh well lol).

The computer pings and I read his message. You win the mexican standoff lol.

That cracked me up because it's normally me who does these weird silly tests.

I still don't understand what the point was but from then onwards we chatted as normal until...

He mentioned that in the weekdays he swims every morning but because we've been chatting until 1/2am he hasn't had the energy to go this week.

I said listen, instead of talking tonight, have a day off and relax, get some rest.

I thought that was extremely nice of me. His reaction? Are you bored of me? Is there someone else lol.

Ha so with minimal reassurance he declined and stayed until 1am.

That is not my fault at all. I gave him an out!! I still have a few bits to do before I maybe see him later.

I have such a low appetite today. Hmm but I want dessert.

Tuesday, 9 November 2021

#BlogLife162 - Christmas unease

 It's only the mere start of November but I can't help circling my thoughts back to Christmas. You're set to move, well hoping to do it this year.

That in itself is stressful enough but to host Christmas too? That seems unfair. I've told you what I think, that it's okay to skip this year, if it's too much.

You're not sprightly anymore. My head is spinning, moving again at my age but being somewhere that has a lift is a more sensible option for you.

I always thought it was strange that you picked an apartment with stairs but maybe you figured it was good exercise? I know for me that's too painful.

I'm not sure I completely understand how you will go from managing your finances to struggling. Why would you put yourself in a position where you will have issues paying bills?

All this is none of my business, which I why I can't comment. The others are encouraging you to go for it and I just want you to be happy, wherever you end up.

The bond between us is back to being severed. I don't think it ever truly healed or maybe the delicacy of it was unable to bear anymore scrutiny...

I do love you and care about your well-being but the things that come out of your mouth are continually disrespectful and cutting remarks.

I know now that it's not something that will be mended. To do that, you would have to change your behaviour, attitude and I don't see that happening.

You have a blindspot when it comes to being civil to me. No of course it is not all bad and I can have the odd conversation with you in short bursts.

However thinking about it.. In relation to certain subjects. Your philosophy stinks and I enjoy your company less. I share very little.

I wish that you were aware of how you alienate me. That you could see, hmmm, maybe I should be more considerate and less damaging..

I will linger around but I have always known, in my case, water has always been and will continue to be thicker than water.

Strangers are more decent than people I know. People I grew up with or befriended..

It shouldn't be the case but it is. 

If I said.......

I'm unhappy but things will be okay..... All you would hear would be, so you're okay then? Great. Moving on, back to me....

If I said I wanted to share something...

You would say....... Oh look at the time, I have to call someone and by the way a weird thing happened with blah d blah and did you know.......?

You're an expert at talking over me and not distinguishing when I'm rambling and when I really desperately need an ear and a sympathetic one at that!!!

Shrugs... It is what it is and has always been. It's not spite but neither is it love.


Wednesday, 14 July 2021

#BlogLife97 - Hello ghost

Have I turned into a clairvoyant? Ha. No fair not. I can't say I believe in all that but yesterday afternoon at about 3pmish I received an email and guess who it was from??

Well? Any ideas? No? Okay I'll tell you. It was from the guy that ghosted me without a word. The one I thought was giving me an ultimatum...

Get a messenger or else! You know that I hate being dictated too so that's never wise. He keeps doing the same thing and if it's a ruse, it's very clever.

It's about the second time I think where he has said he didn't receive my replies. I get all of his without issue and I always wait until it says sent before I shut it down.

Shrugs I don't know if it was an honest mistake or if he is trying to redeem himself and save face? I have no idea, I'm just exploring my feelings and I'm relieved I haven't shared the blog so he doesn't realise what I'm thinking.

I was really shocked to see his email and the content, I was tempted to reply straight away but honestly I was swamped. I was finishing up my voluntary program admin.

I had to tally up my chats which amounted to 157 I'm proud to say over 2 months and I didn't even count the trolls and unsavoury ones.

Then I had to write a summary on my experiences and I had done that partially but I realised I wanted to go in more detail and be more open on my mistakes and how I improved myself.

I am patting myself on the back because it was a good and bad experience. I changed lives and gave people the confidence they lacked but then I felt drained and pulled in different directions which left no time for myself.

N's point of view, I mean let's give him a name before I get confused. Was that he didn't hear back from me so assumed I freaked out and was too much of a nervous wreck to get in touch?

My feeling was that after I questioned it and didn't immediately do what he said, he got frustrated and skulked off, forgetting I ever existed.

Even if he thought I was overwhelmed, why didn't he just send a follow up email asking if I was alright or if I needed to talk? Instead he did nothing and then out of the blue after about a week.....

Has passed, approaches me with........ Why did we cease communicating? Can you see how that's perplexing and difficult not to be cynical about?

He mentioned Whatsapp twice so I downloaded it to my chromebook and to be honest, I prefer talking to texting so we shall see.........


Friday, 4 June 2021

#BlogLife69 - The lost art of conversation

When did fun become a dirty word? Sure I would love to hang out and we can have fun together.

My thoughts... We'll laugh, do an interesting activity. Maybe grab a bite to eat, go for a walk, swap stories...

His thoughts... Sex sex sex. How soon can I get her nude? It's probably going to happen in the car because she said the magic word "fun."

I am a fun loving person, how about you? Entertain me if you think you can.

My thoughts.... I wonder if there will be any lighthearted confessions or wackiness.

His thoughts... This is it. The moment where anything she says I will turn around and make it about sex. I am so going to send her some naked photos. She is going to die......

Am I up for a fun phone chat? Of course, that is way better than texting.

My thoughts.. This will be great, we will just laugh and smile, being really goofy and sharing embarrassing tales.

His thoughts... Wow I can't believe she agreed. Phone sex is on the table. First I'll ask what she is wearing and then I'll tell her I'm in a towel and then............

What do you do for fun?

My thoughts... He'll tell me about his interests and hobbies. I wonder if he is a nerd?

His thoughts... Whoa already? She means sex. I love sex and could talk about it all day and night.

I think I have my point fairly clear. I miss the innocence of conversations where it was getting to know someone outside of the boudoir.

Perhaps I am still too old fashioned but that used to be the most fascinating part of meeting someone new. Their life story. 

Finding out what made them tick. What their dreams were? Now it is......

What do you look like?

How soon can you send me naked photos?

How soon can I send you naked photos?

When can we have phone sex?

What are you wearing?

Can I come to yours for a hook up?


*Rolls eyes* I want no part of you!