#BlogLife260 - Eye on the prize

No matter how careful I am contact lenses always slip through my fingers. I had a dreadful morning when one just disappeared while I was trying to insert it in my eye.

At first I thought it was inside but in the wrong place. The thing about losing them means you need both frigging eyes to find them again.

My technique is I find as much as light as I can, try not to move and feel and shine it in the immediate areas. If that doesn't work I expand slowly and try not to step on it, in case it is laying on the floor.

There are times when it's on the clothes I am wearing so I stand carefully try to feel for it and if unsuccessful, I shake and see if it comes loose in a targeted area.

That is what happened today, as soon as I shook, I saw a glint of colour and noticed it, thankfully. I really didn't feel like making an appointment to replace it.

Iceland has run out of Always maxi pads and those are really the only brand I prefer to use. The rest are too thin and not absorbent enough.

I forgot to purchase some in the market and don't really want to walk that 20 minute painful distance to get them but I fear I may have too.

I have some at home, a few packets but I always fret that I will run out. I hope they return and that the anti bacterial hand sanitizers come back too.

I am down to my last one and don't wish to pay £3 for a bottle. The gel version is cheaper but lingers on the hand, the spray immediately disappears without a trace, which is why I love it.

I guess I can check on Ebay or Amazon. Hmm Ebay is overpriced and Amazon seems to be more reasonable to get a multi pack and save money with postage costs.

I still feel a lil unsettled truthfully. Being told what to do is akin to being bullied, especially when there isn't a choice.

I can stand my ground and disagree but memories flood into my mind of when I didn't have a say at all and just shrank away.

I felt powerless and scared. This is not the same situation but I still feel unnerved. As though somebody is going to come along and take my voice away again and I can't cope with that.

It's a process and I'll just have to ride it out. I made my objections clear and they were mostly respected but I think it boils down to a white lie.

"I was just joking."

Which I don't feel is the case in some elements because this person has tried to force my hand, many times and I have refused and they persist and it's not respecting my boundaries.

Then suddenly they back off but always with a parting shot. As though that justifies it and it doesn't.

Give your opinion and say, well what I like, what is best for me is.... This path right here.

I don't know if it is the same for you but I hope it is. My wish is that it benefits you and so I recommend it but only if that is the right thing for you to do.

I've said my opinion and I'll back off now, what you choose to do next is completely up to you and I will accept your decision, without prejudice, thanks for hearing me out!!

See that above, is what I need to hear, not that judgemental bs.

My opinion is law and you will abide by it!

Go screw yourself!!!