#BlogLife124 - Confident? Yes I am/No I am not!

 Morning all :)

Words have just been circulating in my head for new posts but none of it made sense until just now. How can someone be both confident and insecure?

*Shrugs* Do you know? Are you that person? I know I am. There are just instances where I am totally out of my depth and just faking that I know what I am talking about.

Pseudo confidence or just winging it? Either is acceptable because I am trying to test out my knowledge and see if I can be comfortable in that area.

When it comes to people, talking to them, being around them, I am split. On one hand, with the volunteering I nail it most of the time.

I don't even have any experiences with what they are talking about but I know what to suggest. I know instinctively what to say, I feel it and I can just help them.

It still baffles me because I shouldn't know about any of it, not having first hand knowledge but somehow each chat I take it just bubbles in my brain and before I can fully grasp it, I am typing out some interesting options.

On the other hand in my personal life. I try to have these connections and I just fail miserably. Then it just becomes ever more difficult to pursue them.

It starts off okay and then I test the waters with some spanners and it falls apart. I'm not sure if it is me or them at this point.

Possibly both of us? What I do know is that I like myself and as sad as the outcome invariably is, in these situations with the tests. I'm glad I run them to see who is my type of acquaintance and who is not.

The tests never lie and they have proven to be very fruitful. I feel so much safer knowing I have a plan in place to ensure my safety and that I can stop myself from spilling too much into the wrong source.

Things I like about me :-

My face, especially brows/lips/nose

My legs

My chest

My humour

My brains

My creativity

My writing/fiction/blogging/storytelling

My hands

My voice

My giggle

My imagination

My confidence

My arrogance

My fight

My resourcefulness

My flexibility in adapting

Things I do not like about me :-

My inner critic

My belly

My thighs

My eyes/eyesight

My arms

My clumsiness

My negativity

My impatience

My temper

Excess hair growth

My doubts

My confusion that I still don't know myself

The whole purpose of this is that I am not scared to point out my plus and minus qualities. I am not trying to love every lil thing but neither am I determined to stay disliking certain areas.

I just want to celebrate what I value in me and form a lil less distaste when I think about what I don't see as positive.