#BlogLife712 - My body is rejecting summer

I'm still feeling under the weather, all day cramps, my stomach won't settle and standing just makes me feel weaker.

But I saw the proper pens that I wanted in some cute colours, I opted for purple and a light violet, Stabilo 2x £4.27, not cheap but they look fun to use.

It seems like purple ink is rare, I see the ballpoint pens but that's not appealing, they don't work properly, I want the proper inky ones.

I just got word about the cleanser, that I'll probably get a refund soon as it hasn't arrived, it's lost in the post or the neighbours have it.

Either way later on, I will look for a replacement. This is the time, where a nap would help but I don't feel tired enough, my brain is gabbing away say write write write, I've lots to say ha.

The randoms are kinda getting on my nerves a bit, it's like they just want everything to be perfect.

A few ghosted me but seemed transfixed by my company, I don't understand that, if you're bored, then why chase me??

And some I wish would read between the lines, instead of only thinking about themselves, and their needs.

There's always a reason why I say certain things, why I act stand-offish, maybe try to understand and accept it, instead of pushing pushing pushing.

One of them TA, has a nasty lil habit of disappearing without a goodbye so I turned the tables on him last night and just blanked the last of his messages.

I was thinking, this is sooo petty of me, but he doesn't hold a grudge and there was another reason I did it.

He was being really flirty and I just wasn't in the mood, the heat was intolerable, my body was tired and no matter how many times I told him, he ignored me.

So revenge was pretty sweet and I didn't feel guilty. Ooh that was quick, the refund came through, so no wasted money.

The oil is definitely all out of my hair now, it's back to looking and feeling normal, more lifted.

TA approached me last night and said You fell asleep right? And I was honest and said No I was teaching you a lesson about manners.

I ignored you on purpose so he was taken aback but seem to realise my point initially.

There was no anger but as the night wore on, he was severely delayed in replying and became offended with everything I said.

Passive aggressive, I suppose was his stance so I accused him of acting like it was his time of the month.

I just left without a goodbye again, I don't have time for nonsense.

If you're annoyed, just spit it out and then we can mend fences, otherwise there is just no point.

Ugh I was hoping it would be a phantom period but nope, came on again for the 3rd time this month.

My body is just all over the place, with the pains and tiredness. I really hope I skip July and have a break.

It's already stopped but it's unpredictable and the bloatedness is really bad.

#BlogLife711 - Energy bills no cheaper

Hmm not sure if I am relieved or disappointed. It's just over a month since the smart meter was forcibly installed.

It wasn't my choice, I was told I had to do it and I've just checked the latest bill and it's exactly the same, no higher or lower.

It would have been great if it was cheaper but it kinda doesn't surprise me.

I do think it's a scam. The way that you're not given the option to decline. The way that they harp on about saving you money, is all nonsense and lies!!

I haven't done anything different, I'm using the boiler less, as it's summer and I need less heat.

I'm still cooking the same, although once again no appetite. Plus I'm still charging all the devices nonstop..

Earbuds, laptop, fans, epilator, electric toothbrush, foot scrub remover and electric blankie.

My skin is mostly clear, a lil bumpy with the increased sugar consumption.

I just gave myself a pedicure, actually not sure when my next professional one is due.

I've decided every 3 months, should suffice, plus I wonder if the brow lady is back.

I did just pluck my brows, so they seem better but they need a re-shape so badly.

The neighbours are harassing me again but I'm not answering the door, 10pm at night, they buzzed, what the hell for??

Who does that?? I could have been sleeping. Schmucks!!

A lil update about the Yash lip balm, it's good while using it, but my lips are chapping badly.

I wouldn't recommend it, as it's no different to any other brand, except that it leaks like crazy and that is annoying me so much.

No matter how tightly I close it, the next time I pick it up, it's leaking, ugh, sticky mess!

Oh that was quick, I ordered the gel pens on Friday and they already arrived, woop.

It's Bic and they are the ugliest design I have ever seen, they look cheap, well they were inexpensive at £2.29, oh well, I will still use them at a pinch.

But I thought they were different colours, purple, pink, green, black and blue.

I like that they are thick and dark and comfy to hold but what is with the bloody deception??

If they are one colour, make them all blue!

#BlogLife710 - I can barely stand

I don't know what the hell is happening to me. Yet again the period is finished and yet I feel as bloated, crampy and sicky as ever.

I just went to make breakfast and I fell like I was going to collapse again.

I feel like there is no moisture inside my body at all, like I'm drained, I drink enough, I'm sure I do.

But my stomach is hardcore cramping and I feel so weak. I'm not starving myself, I'm eating and drinking regularly, apart from that one day where I just nibbled a bit.

I've got two bottles of drinks to sip on as I don't feel like getting up, anytime soon.

I should have got more orange juice, I felt lifted, drinking that. I'll see how I feel today or tomorrow and if it's the same will do an Ocado or maybe Onestop shop.

Ugh pmt and whatever this is.....Will it ever end???

It's Sunday evening now and the worst has passed, I still feel as though I'm in a desert in the mornings but I'm okay now.

I decided to do the hair oils just to forget about everything. I'm using the Castor first and it smells divine, kinda sweet.

I didn't pre heat the oil, I'm just not feeling well enough to go back and forth too much.

I poured a generous amount out actually more than I thought but as soon as it hit my hair, it was like it evaporated.

It's so strange, as though my hair was thirsty and it just absorbed it fully.

I was tempted to add more but I'm not sure yet how it will rinse out.

I massaged it into my scalp and ends. It doesn't look too greasy, as I feel it.

I'm letting the bath run so maybe in 10 minutes I will wash it out and see how it feels.

I thought it would way more greasy actually, maybe it's the sign of a high quality oil??

On Tuesday I might use the other one and compare. Holy moly I've just felt my hair and it's really not that oily.

It really does seem to penetrate deeply, that's astounding to me. Oh maybe I'm comparing it to when I used to use the olive oil ha.

That was a mess!! I experimented a lot with my hair. I can see now why they recommend a generous application.

But again I still need to see if afterwards, there is no volume and how the texture is, will it be limp, will it still feel unwashed and dirty?

I have so many questions ha!! Alright the lukewarm bath is ready, going to get my body temperature down.

Will report back when my hair is damp and then dry. I think it's been about 10 minutes and that's enough for me.

Initial impressions were that it seemed standard to rinse it out, what I noticed was that the conditioner and shampoo seemed way more frothy, easily so, which is unusual.

That was nice, my hair is wet and I can't really tell if it's still oily.

It's wrapped in a towel, I sprayed my Mane N Tail leave in conditioner, I want to leave it warm and compressed for a while yet.

I can tell my hair is still wet anyway but I feel refreshed and I was thinking, if it's not clean.

I will re-wash it on Tuesday and see. Oh my the results are in..

My hair looks and feels soooo soft, so playable and not the least bit greasy. It washed out completely, I am so happy.

It's like it's styling itself, the ends are flicking out naturally. The only downside I can see, is that it definitely looks flatter.

The volume is gone but it's not completely dry yet. It feels really good, my scalp feels hydrated but I'm not sure if I would do this treatment and go out.

I hate having lifeless hair, maybe I used too much oil? That is the problem having combination hair, not many products are beneficial.

I'm glad I tried it out, it was a mistake but a fun one. It's now Monday morning, well afternoon.

And my hair is less softer, it appears oily but feels normal with very lil volume.

I'm going to re-wash it tomorrow and I'm not sure about using any hair oil as I'm going to the Market and will see if I can get my Kotex pads as Iceland ran out of Always.

Shoot I knew there was a reason I went to the Market, not just to pick up fizzy drinks, the nausea has returned.

But also the sanitary towels, Oh well. One thing I forgot to mention for a long while now..

Maybe since I've had really short hair, when I'm combing through or styling it with my hands, because I look like a punk rocker when the hair towel is removed...

I kid you not, my hair stands up as though I've had a big shock, ha!

Then I just press it down and navigate it to the left and right and boom done, aside brushing up the back flicks.

Anyway when I'm doing this, no clumps of hair, or any strands come out.

There is a tiny amount of shedding as for some reason I see it on my laptop or pillow but nowhere near the mass it used to fall out.

I'm glad about that. My hair could probably be trimmed again, easily.

And this is all without the multivitamins. Just regular haircuts, good quality products and no longer braiding or tying my hair up as it's too darn short for that, woop.

#BlogLife709 - Fan over me

Afternoony Poppets,

I'm in rare good spirits at the moment. The sun is out and warm, I dug out my fans and even the low setting is enough to cool me.

I prefer my stormy weather but at the moment I'm having mostly a pain-free day which is highly unusual, so I'm making the most of it.

I still have no energy as the period is stop-start and still spotting but that's the price of going 3 months without one.

That was weird, just did an Iceland grocery shop for tomorrow but the payment didn't let me checkout properly..

I called them up and they said it seems fine but contact them if any problems come up.

About the Zoom chicken samosas, I don't think these ones have the peas, they are still mild and tasty, the previous version was slightly better but these will do.

Sneaky sneaky, I thought they finished the fantastic lunch deal, where you get drinks and a side for free but no they just removed the sushi dishes ha!!

Why add them in the first place if you were just going to remove them after?

It's not the same as authentic sushi but it's still good. If I feel up to it, tomorrow I'll do the hair oils and I was thinking, it's probably not a good idea to add it to the shampoo or conditioner as I need those to rinse it out.

Oh something else that made me happy, the Venice Beach yoga pants is baggy, even when I was bloated.

I thought for sure they would be snug, so I think I'm still getting smaller, which is good because at the moment I am craving sugar, a lot of sugar....

Talking of which I just bought and opened the Yaadgaar almond and pistachio biscuits.

I love them! Thick but soft and crunchy, good amount of nuts, not too sweet, I wish they were individually wrapped though.

It was £1.75 for 12, not exactly cheap but they are really tasty. Oh they remind me of Danish cookies, which I used to buy a lot. 

I've gone back to feeling uncomfortably bloated, dizzy and freezing cold, everytime I think I will put the blankie away for summer, the weather turns.

I've just bought some gel pens, I was tempted to buy the glitter ones but they seem too strong, I wouldn't mind a hint but not overpoweringly so.

And I saw MC last night, so that was a lot of flirty giggles. He's definitely good for my ego.

#BlogLife708 - What's been your favourite decade?

One of the randoms posed this question and I had to think about it carefully because I wasn't entirely sure of the answer.

When I was young kid, I don't think I really grasped the dangers around me, I didn't have the mental capacity to work it out, so maybe I had some carefree times and no responsibilities.

When I was pre-teen to a teenager I think that's when I realised that I couldn't open up and trust anyone with my secrets because there was too much fakery all around me.

But I was also maturing and discovering, different looks, experimenting with clothes and makeup and no longer wearing glasses, switching to contacts.

My skin was clearing, my shape was developing. I felt different, womanly but still naive and child-like.

I'm not sure I had any confidence but my brain was switching and it was trying to emerge and trying to figure out, how to feel good about myself and adapt to being more sociable.

In my twenties I think I just buried my past and tried to date and feel normal and come to terms with having health issues that limited my activities.

I looked the slimmest in my teenager and twenties. I ate less, worked out routinely and it was my obsession to try and be perfect on the outside, while the inside was a whole mess of uncertainty.

Late twenties to early thirties, once again I got damaged physically and this was also permanent but this was more serious and took a long time to recover.

I resigned myself to being single and taking care of myself and something changed when I did that.

I think I just stopped caring what men thought of me, what they saw when they looked at me and I focused on what I saw, what I perceived myself to be.

I didn't want to impress anyone anymore. I want to be myself and be accepted. I wanted to be respected and cherished for all my good and bad qualities.

I began detaching from people who wanted to use me and neglect me, thinking they had some power over me.

I stopped giving so much of myself away and became ridiculously cautious around others.

My walls are as high as they have ever been and I don't care, if I've become hard to get to know.

I don't care that I'm closed off. I don't care that I prioritise my own needs and safety first because that's what I need to do to survive this world.

Now in my forties, my confidence has naturally grown but I still feel there is too much darkness inside of me, for anyone to treat me, the way I deserve.

No matter what I do, I can't shake that feeling because although romance lives in my head, the stories I'm writing are playing out..

New stories or daydreams are unfolding, there always seems to be these real conversations and within those rare honest insights...

Where I'm speaking that, I don't really allow myself to dwell on..

I always act the same way and say the same things..

Why do you care about me?

What do you see in me?

Tell me the truth, you honestly are pretending to care, right??

I can't seem to accept that somebody really sees all of me and still welcomes me into their life.

That some guy out there, sees me as enough, that I'm worth getting to know, hanging out with, caring about, falling for....

So what has been my favourite decade? All of them and none of them.

I had so many different good and bad experiences. I've been depressed, I've been fulfilled, I've been scarred and I've been hurt so badly that I didn't want to face another day..

But all these things that happened made me more in touch with my feelings.

It became so intense that eventually the writer in me was born. If I could take it back, I'd want a different life, a happier one.

But I don't think I would be the same person. I wouldn't be able to dig deep and share all these fears and realisations with you.

#BlogLife707 - Second period of the month

I can't stop yawning, I mean 2 late night chats in a row, tsk tut. They were both surprisingly good though.

The first random, I wasn't too keen on his voice but the second one had a really nice one and was more natural, we covered everything.

He didn't try to spice it up, which is highly unusual but I'm glad. Neither of them wanted a follow up so it's just a one off.

I respect that and it doesn't really dent my ego because there are plenty of conversations around the corner.

It always makes me laugh when they say it's gonna be a quickie call and next minute, an hour has passed ha!

That Hellmans lime and avocado sauce is weird because I feel like the more I have it, the less I can taste it. Strange!

The Sriracha one is so much nicer and has a stronger sensation. I much prefer that.

That's weird I have to chase them up, the other cleanser, hasn't been posted yet and that was from the 11th June.

I love that they demand payment quickly but can't be bothered to despatch it. Ugh!

I had a horrible night. My light period ended on Sunday after 11 days off and on and I thought great it's passed.

Then last night it returned but with a vengeance, heavy and I was hoping by the morning it would have stopped but nopey.

I didn't sleep properly so when the afternoon hit by the time I got up, I felt so woozy.

I thought either I'll faint or I'm going to be sick. I have zero energy so I just tried to calm my breathing and race to the kitchen to drink a lot of ice cold water.

Luckily I made it and feel fine now. Surprisingly, there are no cramps but I'm listening to the lighter period subliminal on Youtube.

Sometimes it works, other times it doesn't but it also helps with cramps. I play it on a loop for most of the day and then switch it off.

I should eat something to regain energy but I don't have an appetite at the moment.

I've gone back to feeling lightheaded as it's nearly 5pm and I've been sipping water all day.

I just did an Ocado Zoom order as I had a voucher expiring and I didn't want to be standing for too long in case I passed out.

I got lots of goodies and they've brought back the chicken samosas which I'm happy about, although it seems rebranded.. I hope it's not spicy..

I'm going to force myself to eat something and hopefully that will spur the hunger pangs.

I keep forgetting to bring the fan out, today is quite hot and I'm probably dehydrated and iron deficient.

I checked the post just incase my cleanser was despatched and they didn't tell me, but no sign still.

I just contacted them and will see what they say..

#BlogLife706 - Look beautiful daily

I've just tried the Yes To Tomatoes moisturiser, I thought it would have a fruity scent, but it's more like a faint perfumey one.

It's pleasant and the cream is light, not too thin or thick. I'm glad I'm washing it off and doing the cleanser and mask soon.

As looking at my face it looks dewy and oily. It feels weirdly grainy. I can't really explain that, as there are no beads.

I don't like the finish on my face but it doesn't feel heavy either. I always wash moisturisers off as it's too greasy and I don't like accidentally rubbing my eyes and having cream burning my eyes/lenses.

My experience is that most moisturisers somehow just don't seem to 100% absorb into my skin so that's another reason to rinse it off.

I still get the coating but without the extra oils, yuck. Perfect for my combination oily/dry skin.

Next I just applied the Yes To Grapefruit cleanser on top, that smells fruity and chemically, not bad.

It comes out slowly as it's a thick mask consistency, with a crazy neon bright orangey/peachy colour.

It feels soft on the face, I'm not sure if it will harden. It's supposed to change colours when the face is clean..

There was no tightness as it dried and I don't mind that sensation because to me it feels like it's giving my face a workout and keeping it youthful.

I don't feel I can use my face brush with these products, I don't want them to come off, just yet.

Alright there is no instructions on how long it should last and apparently I was supposed to have massaged it in, oh well.

I got to pluck my eyebrows at some point too. I'm not even sure whether to use a mask afterwards.

The cleanser is a wash/mask hybrid. Hmm. It's been about half an hour and there was no colour change.

Maybe it's more of a light skin thing, which I did wonder about. I'm going to wash it off now.

My face feels soft and stripped, it was fairly simple to rinse off. My skin is definitely glowing, I have that, just had a professional facial done, feeling.

I do have some scars on my face so I'm going to follow it up with a mask.

I do recommend the cleanser, not sure about the moisturiser, when washed off it's fine, if left on the skin, it's just disgusting.

#BlogLife705 - Elaborate brunch

I'm still feeling a bit crampy and nauseated so decided I would do a big breakfast/lunch.

Olives to nibble, egg roti as normal but with the addition of a new sauce. Hellman's 250ml teeny tiny bottle of avocado and lime.

Which I have to say, I'm really surprised that I like it. You can taste the avocado and it's not too sour.

I would recommend it for something different. I can't remember if it was on sale but I paid £2 for it and that's reasonable-ish.

I saw some tandoori chicken kebabs for £4 and 5 in a pack, again not the cheapest but if it's got the mild tandoori seasoning and it does smell great then it will be worth it.

Oh those are lovely but it's not done, probably needs to cook for 15-20 minutes instead of 10, it's hard to guess sometimes.

It's got great tandoori seasoning and is not spicy, woop so looks like I will finish the roti before it's done.

I'm totally confused about whether the Postie is coming today as it's been raining off and on and the tracking is conflicted.

One minute it says it's due today and the next, it's delayed ugh!!

It's the moisturiser and clay cleanser. Hmm. The Ink Dip one hasn't been despatched yet.

Happy to say they arrived, while I was mid-nap, the Ink Dip is probably gonna get here next week.

I just tried out the Sunbest brownie bar, which is like a mini cake.

To me it's exactly the same as the Fibre One dessert but it's better.

The Sunbest is 89 calories and the Fibre One is 90 calories, very similar.

Price is the only difference, Fibre One is £1.45 and Sunbest is £1.

I think I actually prefer the apple and cinnamon one. Sorry for the delay in posting, just felt really sickly the entire day.

Jeez an 11 day period just ended and I'm still cramping hard! I had a late night talking to a random, got to say that was fun.

#BlogLife704 - Chatty chicks watching flicks 14 - Bridgerton second half

Oof the time flew by fast, just munching and will watch the second half of Bridgerton and then Google to see the spoilers because although I've managed to avoid it.

My phone and Googly keep saying fans are upset about something..

Could it be the last series? Could someone else be killed off or quit the show?

Has a storyline wrapped up in an unsatisfying way? If it's renewed maybe it won't be for 2 years.....Who knows...

My food is getting cold so I'm gonna dig into the show. I'm glad Eloise has a strong reaction to the engagement announcement.

She didn't outwardly protest but excused herself and quite rightly is protective of Colin and said harshly but truthfully..

That he can't love until he knows the truth about her identity and Pen, promised to divulge it when she can soften the blow.

So maybe the whole show is coming to a climax as this is the big secret.

Although there are many potential storylines to be shared still..

Aww Kate's pregnant and Anthony's excited, I thought for a second it was their second child but I was thinking of Daphne and her hubby, so this will be their first.

Ooh I was forgetting that Pen had to face her Mama and see what her reaction would be.

Why doesn't she think Colin or anyone could fall for her daughter?

Maybe she's being protective and not wanting Pen to get hurt? 

That was cutting, asking if Colin had declared his love for her?? And he really hasn't.

Aww bless Colin burst in at the right moment and defended Pen's honour.

I still feel like there will be obstacles ahead.. Oh he said he loves aww :)

But she didn't say it back... Ok this time there is no mistaking, they definitely made love.

With Marina he was so proper but I guess back then he was inexperienced and young.

With Pen, he's way more confident I guess. I don't know why but I assumed Eloise always knew or suspected Pen had a crush on Colin but she seems really taken aback by it.

Even questioning the friendship of Pen possibly using her to get closer to Colin which surprises me.

I forgot the Queen is still after Whistledown also, there's so much drama!

Oh no no no, the Queen has put a bounty that whoever has information on Whistledown's identity will receive £5k.

Oh man I feel sorry for Cressida, not the nicest person but she doesn't deserve to be in a loveless marriage with a man 3x times her age.

He's not even a nice man, doesn't like music, art or socialising. No gossiping or frivolous colourful clothes.

But demands tons of babies, yuck, ick. I hope that she will be spared that and find a love match.

It's sweet that Colin wanted Eloise's blessing on his union. How is he going to react when he finds out?

Will he dump Penelope? Will he shop her into the Queen in a fit of rage and betrayal??

Good grief Cressida's intended wants 4 or 5 babies??? What the hell! Horrifying!

Wow! Eloise just gave Penelope until midnight on her engagement party to tell Colin the truth.

I wonder if Cressida will overhear and spill the beans to someone..

At least Francesca is it? And her new beau are talking more, that seems way healthier than silence.

I think they both suffer from social anxiety. But suddenly Francesca seems more composed.

Oh that's a twist. Midnight struck and I thought Cressida and Eloise were going to out Pen as Whistledown but instead..

Cressida decided that she would tell everyone that she is Whistledown to get the reward money and emancipate herself, run away from home.

But what is the Queen going to do and what is Pen going to do?

Pen just fainted, surely she isn't pregnant already? Oh my my my.

Colin is talking about Cressida and Eloise thinks he knows about Penelope!

Oh ok, nope, the secret is not out yet! Eloise just had a hard talk with Pen.

Convincing her not to tell Colin and to let Cressida take the rap, take ownership for being Whistledown.

Telling her to give it up and not devastate Colin that she Eloise and Pen have lied to him all along.

I don't think Pen can give up her voice, her outlet for anyone, including Colin.

Maybe she can reinvent herself, legitimise it somehow??

Aww well Penelope finally told Colin she loves him and in the Church no less.

She should still tell him the truth, that is a huge secret between them, it should come from her, not from someone else.

Looks like Lady Danbury really hates the fact that her brother likes Violet Bridgerton.

Maybe she thinks he is not sincere or maybe it's the face that she slept with her Papa?

Hmm so only Genevieve the dressmaker is encouraging Pen not to give up on her dreams, as Pen wants to quit writing..

If Mama Featherington treated all her kids equally, they would all be so much happier.

Now she is ignoring, the two she favoured and lavishing attention on Pen because of her association with the wealthy prestigious Bridgertons.

So that's why Lady Danbury has issues with her sibling, he may have stopped her from eloping because the man she ended up with, was not her first choice.

I still wonder if Benedict is bisexual and I don't like his new match.

Hmm he declined the threesome offer. I don't think she is that into him, not romantically, just physically.

Oh my busted! So that is how Colin finds out, he follows Pen as she goes to the publisher to set the record straight and then he confronts her.

You are Whistledown??!!

Oof that stung, Colin said he thought he was undeserving of her love but now he will never forgive her for the lies....

Oh poor Pen and poor Colin and poor situation and too many poors!!

Okay so Pen has reclaimed Whistledown but now what?? I was waiting for the confrontation between Colin and Eloise but I'm glad he wasn't that mad.

And I'm also pleased that Eloise told Pen to clean up her own mess because Eloise felt trapped being in the middle.

Eeek Colin is not calling off the wedding but he is livid still, asking if Pen will give it up?

And saying she basically seduced him into marriage. Not good, that's pretty low considering she was a damn virgin!!!

Bad Colin, uncalled for!

Finally Lady Danbury's brother asked out Violet Bridgerton, been waiting for that for agesss.

Hmm I kinda thought Colin was going do something crazy and cheat on Pen.

I knew he was a lil jealous of her writing abilities. Aww that's sweet, Edwina is married and Anthony sensed Kate wasn't quite content.

So he suggested that they travel to India, have the baby there and then immerse into her culture as well as his.

Still not entirely sure Colin has forgiven Pen. Oh goodness me, what is the Queen upto?

Has she finally figured out the identity?? Ooh is Cressida going to find out what Whistledown looks like?

In a way I can understand Colin wanting Pen to give up writing, but on the other hand, that's her true calling..

At least it appears as though Eloise and Pen have finally mended their friendship.

So now Cressida is trying to blackmail Pen so she can escape abroad.

I wonder what it is going to take for Colin to forgive Pen? Oof and then Cressida just outed Pen to her Mama.

I don't like that, Colin took charge and wouldn't even consider Pen's point of view and resolution, he just completely ignored her stance.

That was wrapped up in a nice way but what is next?? I can't believe the truth is out, everyone knows Pen is Whistledown and she herself orchestrated it.

#BlogLife703 - Hi Oil, Bye Oil

It's just past 4pmish and I might have had just a lil nap. My stomach is still lurching, it stops and then it restarts.

Nothing is really helping so I was distracting myself with shopping and I found what I was looking for.

Yes To Tomatoes £4.50 combination 50ml moisturiser. I think it's an organic brand, I've heard of them before, not sure I've tried them though.

Yes To Grapefruit clay cleanser 113g, I think it changes colour £5.08.

Plus an Ink Dip face wash 100ml, supposed to be citrusy, from £10.50 to £3, plus postage but I had a discount so the amount altogether was £9.36 ha!!

I do love a good bargain so beauty reviews upcoming, maybe they will get here at the weekend.

Finally the Beautizone goodies arrived, pictures on Twitter @SleeplessScrib1.

As a reminder of what I ordered. The Olive 200ml anti frizz hair oil £4.

The Vatika castor 200ml hair oil for £4 and the American Dream aloe body butter 500ml for £6.

Lastly the American Dream 500ml body butter passion lily for £7.50.

I'm so glad they were carefully packed with bubble wrap and sellotape so they didn't leak.

What I noticed which was strange was that the Aloe butter looks different to how it was before.

Previously it was like whipped butter, had a thickness to it and was the colour white.

Now it looks green and more like a lotion/cream, however although it appears thinner and not really the body butter consistency that I look for.

It hits my skin in the same luxurious hydrating manner. My elbows are once again dry and cracking and with just a small single application....

They almost feel renewed and smooth and soft. They haven't completed healed but it's a great start and that's why I love the American Dream brand.

It's not cheap but it will be around for ages and you can use it sparingly, for me I want that long lasting value, rather than buying something cheap, using it nonstop and not getting the desired results I crave.

I'm a bit concerned about the hair oils, I don't know if they will mix well with the shampoo or conditioner..

My hair and face are both combination dry and oily so products tend to be a pain because they have to be moisturising but not drown my surface at the same time.

I just realised I don't even know how to use it, is it supposed to be a style aid, where you apply it and leave it in??

Is it supposed to be used during the hair washing and then rinsed out??

My scalp is always dry, the rest of my hair is typically greasy, so anything with oil tends to overpower my hair and leave it flat.

That's why I avoid oils unless it's blended into the product so well that I hardly notice it.

I'm going to have to do some quick research, Youtube or Googly.

Alright I watched a Youtube video and read the back of the bottle on what to do.

The bottle says apply a generous amount and leave it overnight or for a few hours and then rinse it off.

I'm not going to apply a lot because, I know my hair won't like it.

The Youtube video suggested heating it up first, so you get that intensive conditioning treatment and so that it soaks in better and gives you a more pronounced result.

I wouldn't have considered that. I'm still not sure what I'm going to do, my hair isn't due to be washed for a while.

But I do know that I'm probably never going to do those long treatments again because it just doesn't wash out properly and gives me a headache.

I'll let you know....

#BlogLife702 - Beautify your body essence

I just finished the last of the Dove body butter that I think Mama gave me for Christmas and I remembered that I had loved the American Dream body butter.

I went to Beautizone and decided to see if there were any offers about and actually Yes there were, woop.

Hmm I think I made a bit of a boo boo, I thought I was buying the Vatika conditioners but I think I just bought the hair oils.

No wonder it was so cheap, I will just mix it with the shampoo or conditioners.

The postage was £4 I think it was £5 last time. The Vatika olive was £4 and that's supposed to promote softness, shine and volume and less breakage.

The rosemary and citrus is to help thicken condition and nourish and take away the dryness.

I bet they smell amazing. I also got the Aloe body butter for £6 that I used last time and that was on sale.

Then I saw a passion lily version and I prefer scented toiletries so I got that for £7.50 ouchy but it's the same 500ml and it will last ages.

That will be tracked to get here next week, last time it took 2 days but we shall see..

I just got a note to say it's due tomorrow morning, 4 days later, not bad really.

I feel lousy with the cramps and nausea so decided to see if I could pick up some fizzies and dessert but nothing really appealed.

I thought I would try the Grape Fanta version as I hoped it would taste more like shloer but had an inkling it would be more like Kool Aid and I was right.

It has that kinda dryness to it, it's not bad, I'm not sure I would get it again.

Good to experiment though. It's so bizarre to have a light period but have intense cramps, normally it's the other way around.

This is day 6 and no sign of it stopping. Ugh! Least I slept off and on.

It's the same kinda romancey dream, as though my brain is trying to get comfortable with relationships and opening up and feeling safe and spoilt.

Sickiness is finally gone but the cramps remain.

#BlogLife701 - Period jinx

Ugh I felt really unsteady on my feet randomly throughout the day and I wasn't sure why..

But after three glorious months without a period I came on yesterday. I feel like I jinxed myself ha.

Then this morning, nothing but the nausea is still present so I'm not sure what will happen.

I got a foodie review for you, as what I'm trying to do is sample different products so that my tum tum doesn't get fed up.

Or items that I haven't had in ages, as I'm trying not to waste food but I have stuff in the freezer that has no earthly appeal whatsoever.

Golden Wonder have these tomatoey based crisps that I had been seeing for a while and I don't like tomatoes but I like the flavouring, just the same as mushrooms.

Somehow blended it's more palatable to me. I've only been craving ready salted but I've always loved the Wheat Crunchies tomato crisps so thought I would give Tangy Toms a try.

It's a lil on the salty side and it's similar to wotsits but a rounder version and crunchier, they are lovely, but tiny so not that filling as a snack.

It's not ridiculously tart just a teensy bit which just makes it different or similar to the Wheat Crunchies actually.

The story that can't be transitioned into a written tale is still plaguing me. It's just moving along all cute and interesting.

But it's too similar to others so it wouldn't work as a standalone fiction piece. It doesn't have enough of a plot.

I'm on maybe my 3rd or 4th sparring match with a Scrabble opponent and they always start off well, a few anyway..

But then they typically annoy me with lazy no effort turns. This one plays really quickly and expects you to drop everything and do the same, night or day..

At first I thought he was a bot lol. He started doing long words, clever plays with high scores but now he is infuriating as he's overlapping all the sodding words so the board shrinks and there is no way to be creative.

I feel like I will block him soon, it becomes less fun and more tedious.

Why do people start off challenging you and then give up?? Who says you have to play immediately or when you're not in the mood?

Take your fricking time and make it enjoyable for yourself and your rival!!

#BlogLife700 - Milestones creep up on me *700th*

Song of the day - Pitbull - Echa Pa'lla

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaqHAsib8UY&list=FLI0DEk_aDykRP0sJnme-JBg&index=4

We're at the 700th edition of BlogLife and my brain is both consumed and empty at the same time, it just feels scattered.

Thoughts come and go, fiction plays in my head like lil movies. This morning there was no wifi at all, something seemed to have knocked it out.

Normally the laptop is offline but the phones seem to work, this time, no connection but luckily it rectified itself.

There's not going to be any scrambled tale hastily written in one day, pmt is really bad presently and I had a long glorious nap to get away from it and it helped.

I decided to get some Tiramisu 2x pots for £1.80, although I think there was a 3 desserts for £5 deal going.

I never really liked the idea of it, seemed too strong, too tart for me, when usually I crave something sweet.

But the pistachio one and others I've tried are milder and I suppose having given up hot drinks, especially coffee which I previously loved and still do, makes it that much more satisfying.

Hot sweet decaffeinated coffee was divine in the mornings, not too milky, 2 or 3 teaspoons of sugar and an array of dunkable biscuits.

Too many calories day in and day out. I probably had 2 or 3 cups and even though it was decaff, as caffeine makes me sick, it still felt like excess.

Let's do a check in update. Health wise, I would say I've recovered from the fall, no more sharp pains when I move about, that's a relief.

Everywhere else continues to go downhill, but I'm resting where possible, exercising when the nausea isn't hitting me and hopefully the weight loss will continue declining.

The randoms I'm still avoiding, I think it's been 2 months. I think because I still feel a bit fragile and I can't be bothered to deal with anyone trying to mess with me.

Crikey I just googlied about menopause as I'm not sure I've ever gone 4 months without a period, currently it is only 3 but one can hope..

Anyway it says a year from your last period has to pass before menopause will hit you.

I didn't think it would be that long but then again, my body has never followed the typical route so who knows??

#BlogLife699 - Too many stories.. Too lil interest..

Last night I was in the mood for a film so ended up watching Art Of Love the dubbed version with Esra Bilgic of Ramo fame, she's wonderful so it was nice to see her in something else.

It was one of those remakes of Entrapment, with a slight difference, in the film, they were actually exes.

Normally they are strangers playing this cat and mouse game. Esra's ex is a potential art thief and she's an Interpol agent tasked with solving the case.

It was entertaining to watch but I'm not sure I was rooting for them, in reality if she was dating him, she'd sacrifice her career and potentially freedom as an accomplice or something. Hmm.

Everytime I think my shoulder is better it just twinges horribly but so far no pain today.

I finished the Sistas binge and The Oval and now on the Nikita remake with Maggie Q.

I think for me the difference between La Femme Nikita the original show was that it was far more intense and action packed, who was going to live or die?

Who is telling the truth or betraying someone? The Maggie Q one is still good, it's just not as compelling, more like a slower build up.

It's now nearly 6pm and the nausea and cramping have finally stopped, I don't feel as drained or empty.

The stories are cycling through my head and actually had a brainwave on two of them.

I was considering posting all of the drafts, of which there are three but they are not very far along..

And one is Christmas tale that I aim to finish for this year. Short and sweet and it will be my third festive story, woop.

Then I have Lethal Curves Ahead on Wattpad that only has 17 chapters and is nowhere close to being finished, I don't think.

Then on here, I Hate My Fiancee which only has three chapters.

Plus Fighting Fate that is only six chapters along, not very productive at all. Tsk tut.

You know what is really weird? When I'm playing out the characters in my head and making them real..

I can feel what they are feeling. The hurt, the anger, the mushiness or the butterflies...

Strange huh?? :D

#BloogLife698 - Weekend weepy

Just unpacked the shopping and I'm sipping the raspberry lemonade and I took out the bins and checked the post, only to see this flat envelope.

I kept feeling it to see what was inside but I couldn't grasp anything and then I tore it open and found the spare tweezers, yay :)

I haven't liked many of the Vimto drink remixes but I bought the raspberry, orange and passionfruit to try because that sounds like a nice blend.

And it's no added sugar, hmm, it's nice, but it's very weak, hardly any taste at all, it needed to be a lot stronger.

I don't mind less sugar, it doesn't taste tart but it's as though it's already diluted.

And the Robinsons Fruit Creations, zingy lemon and raspberry is really great too.

I feel like raspberries are everywhere at the moment, super popular.

I'm going to say even though I still haven't started my period and it's nothing out of the ordinary to not have it, the pmt is still very present.

I feel really teary for some reason. I can't explain it, I don't feel down as such but sometimes when I watch a show, it highlights something in my brain and I trace is back to a memory..

So off and on I've just been upset but I also feel calm and normal, bit weird but I embrace it.

It's better to showcase the emotions than pretend they are not exploding all over.

Yesterday I seemed to have wrenched my left shoulder, near the blade, it was really painful all day and now it's more bearable.

Maybe it was carrying the shopping, I can't really think how else it happened.

Or maybe I slept funny?