#BlogLife1125 - It's not you readers, it's moi...

I have had so many drafts stored, fully written or just halved that this feels like the first time in ages, I'm staring at a blank page.

Worse still, I can't think of anything to talk about eek. The pressure is on..

I don't think this will go out today, unless I suddenly get inspired..

Finally someone was available to take the rent payment, yeesh I was kinda fed up on Friday, after calling twice and told to call back. Pfft.

I thought Nah, I'd be super vex, if no-one was available for the third time, so to avoid that I waited until today, almost forgot actually.

I woke up at 6amish. The BX29 earbuds are not lasting all night, just maybe 6 hours unfortunately.

Wow only 5 and a half months later, practically newish and already depleted that much.

I need a new pair, I'll save up Amazon credit and get it. I'm not sure there is any reasonable ones in the Market...

I'm still cramping and feeling a bit sicky. Friday is supposed to be my phone appointment..

There's been nothing official to say it is a phone one. I guess I'll be in trouble for a no-show.

I'll just explain my side, that I was told not to show up.

The Calypo lollies are lovely but I wished they fit inside the water bottle, that hint of fruit juice is lovely.

As the money isn't lasting the month, I'm going to spend less on groceries each week.

I tried to update that I had less savings, but it's way more complicated than I thought, so I gave up.

Ahh I just remembered another foodie review. Iceland had another chicken in a bag meal.

I think it was £4 or just under and it was pasta, peas, broccoli and chicken.

It's seasoned well, tasty enough. The broccoli is disgusting, it's just bitter so I don't eat that.

The peas are perfect, soft but not mush, with a lil chew to them.

I don't know why everything has to have broccoli, pick a tastier vegetable..

This bag is similar to the other one, I'm not sure if it was salmon, but that was hit and miss, if you heated the salmon too much, it became tough..

But if you only warmed it for a small while, the rest were cold.. A bad mixture..

The only thing that ever worked with broccoli was the Bachelor's cheese and pasta.

It was dry and you just added water to it, for some reason that combination worked well..

And I think somehow they tempered the harshness of the broccoli, maybe with butter or something else..

Another website that is really laggy and horrible to use, is facebook on the laptop.

For some reason on the mobile, it's really fast. It makes no sense to me.

I'm only using it to enter competitions.

Ooh exciting I was just making a shopping list for the weekend. Iceland is still out of most of the lollies, but broadly browsing..

I saw for some reason the 6x chocolate and nut cornettos which are normally...

Maybe £1.75 have for some reason reduced to 50p lol. I'm gonna get 2x boxes lol.

That's insane, in case they are sold out, I'll get the Magnum knock offs, the almond version..

It's 4x £2. I'm also going to try Nando's sweet chilli jam, it looks interesting..

For my sandwiches. I think I want something different from mayonnaise or ketchup or garlic and herb..

#BlogLife781 - Nobody will take care of you, but you!!

I had an uneasy sleep and then I checked my emails for any appointments, there wasn't any but there was a notification to say login, there's a message.

I thought, here it is, my bills aren't going to be covered and I'm going to be stuck borrowing money from now on..

There was no immediate ping or flashing envelope and then I went on the homepage and it said it's ready to view.

It turns out, thankfully, with a deduction because of my savings, they are still covering my monthly expenses.

I am so relieved, I can pay my rent in full, and all my bills and I can afford to get groceries and household stuff.

I was so worried that from now on I couldn't afford to live. It was a real concern that everything was going to pile up and there would be angry letters demanding payments.

And I thought the evil side of my family is cackling away like a witch, pleased with themselves for causing heartache and misery.

I have a feeling I was right, they were waiting for the statements to arrive before they updated me, as I wasn't due to hear until Sunday or next week.

Now that is out of the way, one last thing remains, I wait once more, to hear back about a fine or worse or a combination of the two.

It's like her impression of me is that I'm wasting money, holidaying abroad, buying expensive gadgets, eating out at pricey restaurants, getting designer gear and blowing through the allowance they pay me.

The reality is far less glamorous. The money goes on rent, bills, food, more bills, more expenses.

Oh and also budget clothes and takeout when I'm absolutely shattered or too ill to move.

I guess the indulgences are pedicures but as that is cash in hand, that won't show up on the statements.

I contributed to the rent, I paid off all the landlord's sporadic "arrears." Whenever they decided to say, Oh by the way, you owe us hundreds and hundreds, when I pay them regularly..

It doesn't make sense to me and they never say Oh by the way, you owe us a lil extra..

They whimsically say, every once in a while, You're in masses of debt to us.......

Quickly make a large payment, right now!

Anyway I don't want to repeat myself, I just wanted to say, there have been loads of times where I almost felt guilty for buying food or taking care of myself, when I have expenses to pay.

But once again, I try to be as responsible as I can. Pay what I owe, on time and then see if there is anything left over for me.

I've worked out why the wifi has been off and on, they are doing roadworks again, they love digging up the road.

I'm always going to be careful with money.

Oh a weird thing that is happening at the moment with the Playtime app, is that they keep removing all the downloadable games and replacing it with another money making application.

Why on earth would you promote a rival? Unless it's a partner company?

But even if it is, why are you removing the games, you want us to play? It doesn't make sense whatsoever.

I called the landlord and explained that I should be able to make a payment next week, I'll only be a week late and then they can calculate it for monthly, not fortnightly from now on.

Then I'll supposedly be up to date, until the next time, they say Oh you owe us.......Blah blah blah..

Lastly I told Mama, that I can manage my bills, as she was worried and I wanted to remove that burden I had placed on her, as soon as I had news.

Hmm yet another screwy notification. The Housing Benefit randomly selected my claim to be flagged for a review.

I basically had to re-claim, that's what it felt like. I had to upload, bank/paypal statements, something with my NI number, which I lost the card, eons ago but I found something.

Then it was evidence about the Universal Credit switchover, as per usual there was nothing in writing, so I just took a screenshot of the payment page, screw it.

Then it was a passport identification photo, I don't care that it's expired, it still has my name on it.

Plus rent statements which I just uploaded the receipt but called he landlord to request a proper statement just in case they want that too.

And I guess the payment I was going to receive this week, is now on hold.

That's depressing again, I was looking forward to paying my rent and bills, while the balance continues decreasing.

Oh and I finally got a Universal Credit appointment for the 5th November Guy Fawkes.

Once again, I'm lost, I don't know what's going to happen. It's not like the form is straightforward, it just is utterly confusing about what information they want, I just put everything, I over-explained but sod it, it's all there for them.

Just as I was starting to think, it's all going to somehow be bearable, it's all a mess once more.

I think I'll just keep this to myself and not tell anyone, until I know more, the crisis is mine alone to deal with.

More waiting. More worrying. It never stops really....

Ooh it's been just under 5 months and the body butter is only now finishing, that was a good run.

#BlogLife779 - Hmm.. All done for now?

Ok I just saw something on the Universal Credit websitey thingy. They said on the 27th October, they will officially tell me how much my first payment will be.

Then on the 31st of October I will receive it. However what is confusing me, is they said, I stated I pay my own rent, does that mean they won't help with the rent costs anymore?

Good grief. It is the most confusing thing ever, every time I discover a new piece of information, I have a thousand more questions.

Why is it designed to be cryptic? I think they implied it will be a monthly payment from now on instead of fortnightly, which I was used too.

What was the money for yesterday supposed to cover? Good heavens, this is doing my brain in.

Maybe they are waiting until I have posted the letter but I still think, they have all the knowledge, prior to me sending it off, anyway.

I told them all about my expenses. I guess next week I will understand it better and see where I stand and how much I will contribute to the rent and bills and food, per month.

I'm still nervous and petrified. I just don't want to think about it anymore.

I've just gotten back from the Market, I think pretty much every bone in my body is aching.

There was no seats, coming or going so I had to stand up and my back in particular is killing me.

I was right, there is no more Post Office locally anymore. It is just a huge library.

I think Ryman's has taken it over, kinda, they seem to scan and photocopy and send off parcels maybe, I'm not sure.

I went in to enquire about the stamps and they sell a book of 8, for £13ish maybe.

I decided to go to the Newsagent and for 6x first class stamps it was £9something, just under a tenner.

I thought purchasing 4, seemed too lil, even though I googlied it and that was the standard.

I don't want to risk the post bouncing back to me, on a deadline so I thought, what the hell, just affix all 6 six stamps to it and it won't matter if it's too much, it will get there at least.

There's still no sign of any appointments, I checked the post and nothing there, so that's it for now, until she looks it over and gets back to me.

Ugh I tried to use the stampcard on Just Eat to get some food and typical it didn't work, I would have only paid a pound for a sandwich and garlic bread and fries.

I'll just make something later. I'm trying to be creative with the sandwiches so I don't get bored.

If they were creamier, it would be more satisfying to eat. I was contemplating, cooking sauces like lemon or a honey and mustard..

Or even a cheese and tomato, I know they are mean't to be stirred into the frying pan but I need something budget friendly that will last a while, that I'll actually savour.

There is a Chicken Tonight, honey mustard that's sweet and tangy, I'll try it, I'm not that keen on mustard unless it's the Americany sweet one.

But it seems like the only white version Iceland stocks, the rest seem spicy or tomato based.

#BlogLife720 - I can't read at the moment

I am still struggling with using one contact lens. I don't know if the left one has a stronger prescription as my dominant eye, the right is much weaker.

If I kept the right lens in the right eye, I wouldn't be able to see, nearly as well.

I find that everything is still blurry and reading is quite taxing as it's not clear at all.

I decided to do a deep clean and popped a protein tablet into my lens case and now my lens feels more comfy, but the reading hasn't improved with fine print.

So it's definitely the lens which is a spare and probably really old.

I will just tell my optometrist on Thursday when I see him.

I have a strange update for you. This is why I like to try something immediately and give feedback and see if it changes later on.

Regarding the Yes To Tomatoes moisturiser, which I initially wasn't keen on.

It left my face grainy and over oily and just horrible in appearance..

Well I think it was my third use, that it miraculously changed. I have no explanation as I didn't do anything different.

But maybe it wasn't shaken or there was something at the top? I have no idea.

 But now as the old one is done, the Neutrogena, I am using it more frequently and it's behaving normally.

It's light, smells great and it's not so greasy. It feels smooth and I could go out like this.

My face no longer looks like I bathed it in oil. Weird huh? Now I would recommend it completely.

Probably for me though, I can't wait until I wash it off. I don't like that feeling of almost oiliness.

I like my face free and cleansed.

As for my back and legs, I'm treating the pain with my heated blankie, binaural beats videos and I'm just charging my shiatsu heated massager because I need something to work.

I think each day is getting a lil better but as I'll be heading out twice next week, I need to fix it now.

The more exertion I do, the worse it becomes. Having that shower/bath and pampering, just left it really delicate.

It felt glorious the hot water but probably wasn't a good idea, to do the oil treatment.

I had a feeling going out would exacerbate my back and it has, it's not so much walking around that sets the pain off.

It seems to be changing positions that brings back that painful surge.

I'm not looking forward to going out tomorrow to see the Optician but when he finally orders the replacement, it will be a relief.

I dug out the massager as the discomfort wasn't subsiding and I didn't want to carry on finishing this post or do much of anything really.

I decided to go ahead and get another face wash. The reason being, the Yes To Grapefruit is more of a mask, than a cleanser.

It feels like a waste to instantly rinse it off when it's supposed to be left on for about 20 minutes or however long it was.

In the mornings and evenings I just want to quickly clean my face, I leave the prolonged deep cleansing for the weekends.

I just bought another simple one for that purpose. Ha it's actually another men's product but I don't care.

Hawkins and Brimble elemi and ginseng 150ml for £4.50. I wanted to try a different brand and didn't see anything else that appealed so I'm hoping I will like the fragrance and consistency.

#BlogLife365 - Boiler timeout!

Good heavens first last winter the boiler breaks down after getting the all clear on the biannual check up and now it's busted again.

I suppose I should be grateful at least this dude did a thorough going over and spotted..... Don't ask me, I'm not technical as soon as he said it, it vanished from my head.

It almost made me laugh when he asked to borrow a pen and the only one I could find was green and I said will that do and he grumbled, it'll have too.

Then he asked an even dumber question, what do you decide? I can switch it off and you'll have no heat or hot water or I can leave it on.

I asked the question we would all enquire..... Is it safe to leave it on?? He replied Oh yea definitely.

Then healthy or not because he mumbled, you'll need it on for your conditions..... Who on earth would vote to switch the bloody thing off???

He made this whole song and dance about, I have to say the words I refuse and gave me this written warning attachment as though the thing would explode.

Didn't he just admit, it was safe to leave it on???

I just got a text saying it should be completed by the 7th but that seems ambitious.

I need the assessment appointment to determine if it can be fixed or needs a replacement boiler, then they'll have to order it.

There's probably still a backlog and they don't work weekends I don't think..

But again at least he reported it. In the passed people have forgotten and I've had to schedule manual fixes myself.

I'm going to try and not stress about it and enjoy the heated weekend ha.

For now it works, let me just savour heat while I can.... Oh I just got a text mentioning something vague about calling them and regarding the new boiler.

I wonder if they have decided it's easier to install a new one, rather than tinker with it. It is ancient. I think it's the same one they put in when I moved in.

I can't be certain though, it was ages ago. I'll just wait for my phone to charge and then I can arrange a date.

#BlogLife196 - Controlling the chaos

I'm trying not to be too self indulgent but it's getting tougher to stay strong and put on a brave face.

To stay motivated and carry on regardless. I miss being warm. I miss washing my hair and having hot showers.

I miss being comfortable and relaxed. On the upswing of things. I have been getting my winfalls curtesy of the Looney games.

Won 10k gems before and now just been informed I won some toon pieces. I'm opting for Coach Daffy as he is going to disappear soon.

I cheekily hinted if I could have 100 pieces of 2 toons and he agreed so I opted for the unlocked versions of Coach Daffy which I wouldn't have gotten and Corny Conductor Elmer.

I always unlock toons I don't have, at least you can play about with them, rank them, tune them but if you don't even have them unlocked, you're screwed.

The unwritten rule is you're not supposed to choose toons that are locked ha but seeing as I've always done it and got away with it. I'll just keep at it until they say no.

I'm hooked on a new show Crisis and it's unpredictable and gritty. One of those shows you shout at the screen..

I did not see that coming, he's the bad guy and he's the good one??? Really? Yowser.

The show is pretty much keeping me sane at this point. It stars Gillian Anderson, Mark Valley and others I don't recall the names.

It's about the powerful rich kids being kidnapped and the parents blackmailed into doing tasks for the kidnapper.

No spoilers but it's really good. I don't feel like taking any volunteer chats today as I feel like saying....

Hey you, cheer me up for a change!!

However I did support someone who volunteers and had a bad experience.

Sometimes it's enough to know that, others go through the same and we all get frustrated..

That person seems to feel better so that's good. I think I want to wallow a bit.

I should load up a tearjerker film fest :) I chased up the boiler repair and was told I have to ring another number which is closed so will try tomorrow..

#BlogLife195 - The misery conspiracy

I just feel like blah at the moment but only on the surface. The temporary fix that had my boiler producing heat and hot water has now stopped.

I am back to being a frozen bunny and it's just really hard to function. I don't have any issues getting up but once there I feel like what is the point?

I am super grateful for my life saving heated fake furry blankie, which is keeping me sane.

I can't shake this cough and hoarseness without proper heat and have caught a chill where I'm sniffling.

I've lost my appetite again but am munching to warm myself up. My hair is even shorter now, above my shoulders. 

I have to see what it looks like in curlers but I have no interest in doing that yet.

Maybe I should book a eyebrow wax and pedicure or even a facial beautician appointment but I don't feel in the mood to go traipsing about.

I don't even feel like retail therapy which is my normal pick-me-up method.

I wasn't even going to write anything today but I'm hoping by admitting all of this negativity I'll feel unburdened?!

I think I'm getting slightly better at picking my titles. I'm trying at least..

I am easing back into the volunteering not daily but a few times a week.

I feel calmer doing it but at the same time, just empty. I really don't think I'll be my true self until the boiler is fixed.

I fully intended to change the theme/template, whatever you want to call it but I think it's growing on me.

A cute night time appearance. I guess I'll see if I can find anything that I like better that doesn't need tweaking to display correctly.

Forgive me if my posts aren't daily. I'm really struggling to get my thoughts in order.

Take care :)

#BlogLife189 - Looney Tunes World of Mayhem 4

 A quickie update note. After pondering and procrastinating I have finally added gadgets to my toons.

I'm sticking to my instincts of only using the purply rares and using the same kind, whether it's the swordy, shieldy, plus. I think that's it.

As by using the same 4 types of gadget, poms for example, the hidden/bonus boost is activated.

For my Sea Goin Sam I opted for rare horned helmet, as either I had run out of poms, or for some reason I felt it was best.

Sword - Attack, mean't for attacker toons.

Shield - Defence, mean't for you guessed it... Defenders.

Plus/Cross - Health/HP possibly mean't for healers, unsure.

After looking at all of the gadgets. I only like the poms, I added four of the same to Hillbilly Hare and Nova.

I put two sword attackers and 1 shield defence and 1 plus/cross health. 

That is the way I've decided to do it, whether right or wrong and I'm not saying do the same, I just think I want an overall boost.

They are maxed up to 12 some of them and seem boosted slightly.

I've also started being more daring in the saloon. Now I just chance it and attempt to get to the jackpot, claim it and quit.

One of the youtube videos, said, watch closer at where the joker is and go for that or near it and that strategy has been working well.

I can't get past Tricky mode on the R&D no matter what toon combinations I try. I think I'm too weak.

Big war map isn't as scary as I had envisioned. I guess I have gotten a lot stronger with my toons and adding the core boosts evenly.

I do lose the occasional fight but win most of them. The trick is to half or double your opponent's total power because some of them are deceptively tough and will wipe out one or two of your weaker toons and you won't get that 3 star perfect score.

My only locked toons are Concierge Elmer, Zombie Sam, Coach Daffy, Countess Penelope. Lunar Toro and Raider Lola.

My most powerful toon keeps switching, it's currently Nova Bunny 39,095, 5 cosmics, tuned up to 34 and ranked at nearly 7.5.

Tip for everyone. Under the toon, hit the find button and you'll see where you can exchange for more pieces. It's not always available but for some dumb reason, the toon pieces you want, aren't always displayed.

Scopely in it's infinite wisdom has decided to hide them. They should have had a scroll system, that would have been better, we all have our toon preferences.

Last tip, save the gadgets for your most used toons, not all of them. It's expensive to do it that way and not needed.

Happy warring :D

For Nova Bunny let me list the gadget boosts as they have the maximum 12 stats.

47.2% attack

14.8% critical defence

9.9% tenacity

20.1% defence

18.9% debuff resistance

28.3% health

6.8% critical damage

These are random boosts, so yours may differ. I don't know if the above is good or bad but a boost is a boost.

For Hillbilly Hare :-

20% attack

23.7% defence

18% critical damage

58.8% health

3.6% critical defence

11.6% debuff resistance

10.5% tenacity

This looks different because I used 1 swordy pom, 1 defence pom and 2 health poms.

I hope this gives you a better picture, so you have an easier time, figuring it out.

#BlogLife184 - Bah humbug, just kidding Merry Christmas readers :D

Happy holidays to each and every one of you and I hope you are enjoying time away. Just relax and do your own unique thing.

Sorry I've been kinda quiet. I arrived safe and sound and the cab driver was a funny, chatty guy so no panic attacks while travelling and he made it easier.

Not helpful with the massage case bag, the laptop bag, the overnight bag, my handbag... But they sometimes brag the same thing..

Oh I usually help, blah blah blah.... Yea right, no tip for you. Actually the tip is..... Get off your arse and assist!!

Moving on, I'm settled in and didn't forget anything, like I usually do but I haven't been sleeping at all until now and that leaves me quite un-creative and annoyed.

Plus all these pmt symptoms even though I've finished for the month, still feeling dizzy, sickly and uncomfortably bloated so just tired and icky really.

Which means no posts for you and a million ways to try and relax for me.

No dramas yet but the family impromptly arrives tonight or tomorrow, so watch the space because I am in no mood for the bs express.

I overloaded the bags because I had extra stuff for mama and the person who shall not be mentioned. Obligatory gifts... Pfft.

I don't usually walk with my cordless shiatsu heated massager but at home I can sprawl out and write and shift positions to a nicer one, here my body is upright on a chair/sofa and it locks up painfully....

Thus applying massage and heat helps relax the tense muscles and then I don't feel so miserable and crippled in pain.

Sometimes it's just weird being outside of my home and remembering. Ooh I need this, that or the other or I am screaming in agony..

We haven't exchanged the gifts yet and I am not really fussed. I keep having this story idea in my head. 

Actually there are quite a few waiting to be written but I don't have it in me. Need more sleep for that to happen.

I'll post these at some point but not yet.

If you are wondering what I received for gifts? Cash. cash and Beats headphones in a flashy red shade with a cute baby pouch to keep them in.

#BlogLife140 - What's wrong?

If you're following my twitter, you'll know I'm on a hiatus at the moment. I don't feel as bad as I did but walking around, stepping anywhere sends me jolts of sharp pain.

Without going into details, this is what it is. I had something as a teenager which had a varying degree of intensity. Some days blah I'm sick?

You wouldn't notice, I didn't notice. Other days it was like, I couldn't do anything at all. 

Then nearly two decades ago something else occurred and it's as though, it increased everything.

My body was like ok, you are just about managing and now seriously?

You want to add that to the mix? You know that has made everything heightened?

It all seems to merge together so the backache is from a pre existing injury. 

Except because I am so fragile, the pain is not staying in one place.

No no no. It wants to have fun, spread around and play games, so it's decided, Hey I'm going to affect your lower and upper back.

When you sprawl out, I will send out mini twinges, just to let you know I'm still here. 

If you try to move at all. Big mistake. I will remind you who is the boss.

The pain will be crippling. It doesn't matter how slowly you walk, how small your steps are, even if you are holding onto the walls.

There is no difference. The pain will be violently strong and then while you are upright but motionless. 

Just for giggles. I'm going to wait for you to relax and then send sharp bursts of pain to you.

It's coming up to a week and I was excited about finishing my story and recording it but I don't think it would work with me saying ow ow ow ouchhhhhh during the voiceover.

I may still work on it a lil bit but I am just trying to keep calm, sleep a lot and do as lil as possible to maintain some sort of toughness and semi alright mood.

That's about it really, in case you were wondering. That is what I am dealing with! See normally I just contend with ongoing dull aches but when it comes to sharp piercing pain..

My brain just can't shake that off and it affects me profoundly. It's near impossible to be productive, strong or calm.

Very unpleasant. I don't recommend having health issues, kinda screws up your days......

#BlogLife132 - Looney Tunes World of Mayhem 2 update

I am just doing Conditions Apply R&D I hate it to death. I used Devil Dog, Pepe Le Bard, Scarecrow Sylvester and Speedy Gonzales.

It took me numerous tries to complete and not because my toons died. It is just one of the many buggy aspects of the game.

It just never lets me progress although all my toons are alive and well. 

Now I am on stage 2 using Archon Elmer instead of Devil Dog and still stuck.

Ugh, it is frustrating but overall it is a fun sociable game. My username on discord is MzLooneyTuner. 

I added the Mz because everyone assumed I was male. Ick. Now I have clarified it. I feel better. 

My in-game name is LooneyTuner. Just in case you were curious to see if I really was playing along with you all.

I recently had enough cosmic stars to get my first hypernova pull and got a 6 star Dr Dawgstein which wasn't bad really. 

I'm glad it wasn't a duplicate. My only other 6 star cosmic is Masked Avenger and they aren't maxed out very much I'm afraid. 

My current maxed out toons are Don Henery, Sea Goin Sam, Zoot Suit Daffy.

Plus Henery Hawk, GridIron Gossamer, Henery Hike, Grand Duke Sylvester. 

The Sea Devil (one of my favourites), Van Wile, Egghead Jr, King Bugs, Sam Sheepdog, Witch Hazel.

Ooh and finally Ralph Wolf, Leopold, Devil Dog, Miss Prissy and Salesduck Daffy. 

Phew way more than when I first started and struggled.

I have 218 gems and 853k currency and zero gold tickets :( 

I still refuse to spend money on the game and just do my best. I have actually managed to climb up to level 71 now from the previous maximum of 69.

Ranking up is very slow but I like the energy being refilled that goes with it. 

It stands at 122 at the moment. I haven't got my BarrelHawk Henery to 4 stars but almost there, 5 pieces left.

I have got 3 cosmic stars on him from the milestone rewards and have tuned him up to 36 which is probably the farthest I have ever done it before.

I'm waiting for Ogl to announce the winners for the latest competition, he does giveaways on his channel. 

https://www.youtube.com/c/OGLGameplays/videos

There is also Smokey who streams..

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC2zmhLBVOv-chUaEzGk14hw

My alliance is Cereal Killers which is a really cool mix of people and has gotten a lot livelier now. Girls, guys and a range of newbies and experienced players.

I honestly haven't experimented with the gadgets. I would rather spend cash elsewhere. 

I eventually will after I improve toons but just isn't something I can be bothered with at the moment.

I do love the new Punch In system, very easy to click and claim rewards. 

The extra energy and perks come in handy. I'm sad they haven't mentioned bringing back the Desert event that they mysteriously cancelled.

Seems peculiar to me. The upcoming events are Forest Regionals, Villain Spotlights and a new toon. DeckSwab Dawg for the Pirates team.

Oh also there is a PTL for Dead Pirate Penelope. Anything I missed, you know where to find me :)

I know it is exciting when a new toon debuts and you scramble to take part in the new event. 

Unlocking and ranking and reaping the delicious milestone and event rewards..

However try not to go crazy and go broke improving them because the next tournament is just around the corner and you are going need resources to take part.

*Update* I realised I put misinformation above. We've changed the alliance name a few times. 

First The Great North, then Cereal Killers and now Looney Fortress. I totally forgot. Oops sorry :D

#BlogLife121 - Mistplay App update

I have been using this app for about nine months now. It didn't seem that long ago since I discovered it. It is still a bit buggy where I will be playing a game and suddenly it pops up with a message..

To signify I am no longer being rewarded so I have re-click on Mistplay to keep benefiting from the perks. They haven't added Paypal or made it available for Apple users but I hope those additions are forthcoming soon.

I think I have redeemed about 5 times altogether and my current balance is about 996 units. Which is pretty nice overall. Just for playing games.

There are still irregular codes and competitions running on their social media pages which helps. I am just a bit sad about the gameplay.

I really have come to love Daily Themed Crossword even though it is a low earner at 1 unit but it's fun with large and mini types of puzzles.

The only issue is the abundance of adverts and I keep doing the same ones over and over. It doesn't seem to register them as completed which is annoying.

However the plus side which I have never seen before is that, when you are on a streak or maybe just randomly it sprinkles letters across the board for free.

I don't know about you but I typically get stuck or think there could be more than one possibility but here at least with some letters revealed, it's less frustrating.

I uninstalled most of the games as the rewards were taking too long to collect and it doesn't register accurately the time spent playing.

New games pay you faster so that is what I look for. I just hate that the dull ones pay a lot and the fascinating ones, do not but some I can leave running.

I am currently playing Pop Slots casino as that has the maximum 4 units to earn but it is very boring just running slots. It does level up fast though :D

Also I spotted a new game which was Solitaire Cruise, I wish they had the regular version, instead of tri-peaks. It's still challenging and interesting but I prefer the original game.

That is for 3 units which should help me cash out faster. That's it really. Just keep looking out for new games and be aware that they can modify the amount of units for that game, at any point.

Any questions, just ask and I'll get back to you.

#BlogLife66 - How do accolades make you truly feel?

I mean I am sure I have gotten them before but today somehow it was different, as though it was the first time someone stood up and acknowledged me.

They said something along the lines of.... 

"You do realise what good work you are doing right?"

I don't know why that struck me so hard. I half smiled and half thought huh so that is what is bugging me. Most of the time I don't feel appreciated.

I hear the words Thank you but it is as though it is being said automatically without the sentiment behind it.

I am not referring to the people I am supporting or the organisation that hired me, they are sincerely grateful and I take that on board.

I am referring to friends/family who expect me to drop everything when I'm occupied. My time and energy is redirected elsewhere and yet I stop and assist them.

I did have good friends and people that were there but I still never felt really heard. It was although a timer was counting down.

"Come on, come on.. 

I can only spare a few seconds.. 

Sorry what did you say? 

I didn't get that. 

I'm kinda busy with...

Sorry I have to dash......."

My favourite line was always.... "I promise, we'll catch up soon." It never did quite arrive and I can only chase a friendship for so long before I wonder what the hell am I trying to keep it alive for?

It's clearly dead. I am not sure if I will do it but I am thinking of taking a blog break. Maybe a week of no writing. I don't know if I will still post BookLife. 

I have posts saved and written but I am just not in the mood to be here. I feel dissatisfied once again. I could start again. Delete this blog and reinvent myself.

Delete the Facebook and Twitter profiles I set up also. Completely disappear. That is quite tempting. I am not looking for pity or attention.

I am just airing my thoughts and there is a lot of unrest in my head.

Goodbye for now.

SS

**1/6 Update**

I thought I would just take time out and take a breath, do some beauty treatments and have time for myself without worrying about the books or the blog.

Also entertaining you lot. I'm still fond of you but having this moment to myself was exhilarating. I didn't realise how stressed and agitated I had become.

I definitely needed this and there is a whole load of posts waiting to be published that you will receive each day. 

I hope you've been well and enjoying some fabulous sunshine and warmth or out discovering new blogs or reading some of my old posts, you've never noticed before..

I can't find a template that represents me, all of me. I have settled on this one for now as it uses non caucasian models and uses a musical/dancing theme.

Plus the purple colour is cute and everything lays out without me having to tinker with it. I suppose I want an angry/vulnerable woman, not girl.

Non white, that loves music and being creative, with splashes of bright colours, who isn't a party animal but is more of a solo artist.

Now is that too much to ask?? :D Evidently it is!

Thank you to those that were curious and checked out Faithless Pursuit. I appreciate it but the reads tapered off so I won't be publishing anymore.

It's still on Wattpad so if you want to continue on, there is where you will find it. As for the complete removal of the commentaries you'll have to check out the next blog, or the one after that, to discover why.....

#BlogLife44 - Saying Yes vs Saying No

The adrenalin is still coursing through my veins and today has been a whirlwind. I got rejected from one of the roles I applied for and the one I was really keen on got back to me today.

I was expecting another rejection but they were interested and wanted a more indepth application so instead of panicking and putting it off as per usual.

I just jumped right in and filled it completely up. I sold myself and listed my positive attributes. It took no time at all actually and I even responded to the email.

I mean there are no guarantees that I'll be successful but at least I am making some headway and if I am not lucky in this position, maybe the next one will be the right fit?

I'll keep you updated as I still have to pass the official interview, I'm guessing they will vet me first and gather more information before making their minds up.

I've done my best though. I wonder if I'll hear from the other one. The date had expired but it was still listed, although not locally.

I'm not sure if they forgot to pull the advert or if they still need volunteers? Either way I jumped at it because it seemed interesting.

The funny thing is I was asked to pick a start date and rather than putting it off. I picked tomorrow, instead of next week lol. I just want to go for it.

Ooh I got a response. I'm not sure if I did the right thing but she said tomorrow might be a premature start date with all the training and grading but she left the choice up to me.

Right or wrong. I insisted on tomorrow, instead of next week. Eek, the pressure is on. I wonder what is expected of me? I wonder how I'll cope?

There are choices between having a photo up, using your real name or staying anonymous. I'm not sure really. Part of me wants to stay hidden as usual.

The other part thinks, would it be so bad to reveal a bit? For once to be completely transparent. I just realised my bio has personally identifying material about me.

On second thoughts. I'm removing the photo and my real name. It's too much, too soon and I don't want anyone latching onto me.

I know it's just temporary but still. I like being confidential. Actually don't hate me but I've changed my mind for the third time :D

I'll keep my name because it's going to be used frequently and at some point, I'll mess up and forget I'm using a fake name so meh.

But the photo is definitely removed. I feel much calmer today. I read through a lot of the information packs and it stuck and I remembered that I can talk for England.

I'll be fine :)

March musings

Good evening, almost :)

I hope you are all well and enjoying some sunny weather. I've just taken off the heating because I've been preoccupied with the blog.

To be honest, I wasn't sure whether to do a monthly update (musings) or BlogLife. I went with this one because I wanted to tell you all how sorry I am for the state of this blog.

Thank you for your patience. I felt really restless with the background and wanted to jazz it up. I don't know anything about the coding so I prefer my templates ready to install and not needing further edits.

The layouts aren't customisable for some reason so I have had to download a few dozen and see if I like them. Being a woman it had to emphasis something feminine.

If I saw another flowery theme though, I was going to hurt somebody. Shish we aren't all into flowers and hearts you know.

I'm sad that in the end I didn't get to try out the Bzz campaign for the eye drops. That would have come in so handy as my lens are irritable and I just did a protein tablet deep cleanse overnight to fix them.

On to the new theme, what do you think of it? I didn't want to have something flirty or provocative, that isn't how I want to represent the blog.

I am used to being in the shadows and not in the limelight. I want to observe others, not be the centre of attention. Having said all that.

I am desperately trying here, not to contradict myself. I feel like I have been playing it too safe. Unfortunately (and fortunately), there are a lot of intriguing fellow bloggers out there.

I need my page to stand out a little so that when new or my sweet curious regular readers seek me out, they may not see stunning photos but they will hopefully see some unique and interesting content to get hooked on.

On Twitter I said I was going to try and change the title and description colours because they are so hard to read but I don't even know if that is possible and today I am exhausted so it isn't happening anytime soon, if I can even attempt it.

I was just so relieved to finally have something I liked. It's not me but maybe that is a good thing? I keep saying I want to grow and promote myself and that starts with changes..

I never present you with an upload schedule because I'm afraid I wouldn't keep it, with the BlogLife series though, they are super easy to write.

If I continue, it should mean that you get more regular posts. I don't want people to get bored of it. I can only go by the reads and so far..

It does seem to be enjoyed, even though you naughty, naughty readers haven't joined in :D I am trying to include the silly answers and give more of myself in terms of stories or memories.

But honestly I am determined to have a mix of serious and lighthearted BlogLife chapters. I think that is more realistic. I know we all prefer a giggle, here and there but life isn't always like that.

Makeover theme

I think I'm ready for a change. I did like my cute purpley notebook theme but I want something a little smarter. Plus the *About Me* section being empty cannot look good.

I'm already scouring the internet for inspiration but so far nothing appeals. I don't want a clinical look. I still want it to be cosy and welcoming but less amateurish. I think I have found my writing groove so I am happy with my content and I'm not looking for fame or fortune, just a little recognition.

No matter how good my intentions I am never going to be a regular poster. I can only write when I feel emotional, otherwise I'm occupied with other things but I am dedicating more time to my writing so I should be posting semi regularly anyway.

It lifts my mood and makes me feel productive when other areas of my life stress me out. I wish I remembered what site I used for the other theme because I remember liking quite a few of what they had on display.

I toyed with the idea of some dark themes, black and white possibly to fit the mood but actually I prefer going the other direction. An array of colours which I hope would draw any potential readers in. I'm not sure if I will keep the layout the same way either. I'm really not technical so whatever is easier I will follow through with that.